The Locker Room

Pretty Little Liars 2x22--Emily Re-Cap

2012-02-28T18:36:00.000-08:00

So no Paige this week but definitely some new drama developing on the Maya front. Did she run away? Is she missing? Is she affiliated with “A” or is “A” behind her disappearance? WE DON’T KNOW! Or, at least, I don’t.

One of the biggest highlights of this episode was getting to see Emily and her father interact, again. I truly love her dad’s character. He’s the only dad on the show that is completely level headed and not a total douchebag. He accepts Emily’s situation and even encourages her to look for and fight for Maya. All together now, “Aww….” However, we do find out at the end that Emily’s dad is being deployed again…sad face.

At the end of the episode we see A’s black-gloved hands holding up a newspaper with Maya’s picture on the front page and the words “MISSING GIRL” in bolded letters. Maya has been a cliffhanger ending for 3 episodes in a row now which tells me she has something very important to do with the finale that’s coming up in two weeks. I really hope she isn’t “A”…or dead. Even though I’m not a Maya fan, that would suck big time.

As far as the other characters go, we found out that Melissa is more-than-likely not “A”—just a bully who lies. Spencer’s dad was not trying to cover up an Alison bribe, but just clear Melissa’s name with her murder (because she was such a bully).

Hanna's mom played by Laura Leighton

This episode was titled “Father Knows Best” but I really think it should have been “Mother Knows FUCKING EVERYTHING” because, honestly, it’s Aria and Hanna’s moms who are bringing us a step closer to discovering A’s identity. Both of the mothers realize that something is up with the girls and are taking matters into their own hands in order to protect their daughters. I love it.

Hanna is by far the most adorable character on the show. The way Ashley Benson delivers her lines slays me. So cute and so funny. So from now on I’m going to (well, try to) pick my favorite ‘Hanna-ism’ from each episode. This week’s Hanna-ism:

“Can’t we get in trouble for withdrawing evidence?”—Hanna

“…I think you mean withholding.”—Aria

Also, I’m going to try and add in my favorite line from the week. This week’s came from Aria when asked by her little brother, Mike, why she fights so hard for a relationship that causes so many problems in her life:

“When you love someone, it’s worth fighting for…no matter what the odds.” (This could be the first line of the refrain for the gay anthem, in my opinion—now somebody write it.)

Just as a reminder, by the end of the season finale 2 weeks from now there will be one person charged with Alison’s murder, one ‘beloved’ character dead, and “A” will be revealed. I also found this list of spoilers on IMDB.com:

--Aria’s wardrobe is significant in the final episode
--The episode takes place during a masquerade ball. Hanna and Caleb go as a spin-off of Romeo + Juliet.
--One of the girls is going to make a deal with “A” thus betraying her friends.
--Spencer and Toby kiss and may get back together in this episode.

The Masquerade Ball from the Finale

So I found the picture above and looked at Aria’s ‘significant costume’ and immediately noticed the long, black gloves. Is Aria “A”!? Does ‘A’ stand for Aria…? That would be a HUGE twist. Two weeks seems so far away!

Anna's Oscar Crush: Jessica Chastain

2012-02-27T10:17:00.002-08:00

So…the Oscars were last night. Yup. And it was fine and it was a classy affair and my favorite film of the year won! Yay for The Artist!!! And Tina Fey presented and looked so adorable and sexy. And the Bridesmaids presented and cracked me the fuck up. And Emma Stone charmed her way into my heart and my pants. And J.Lo’s nipple made a much welcomed appearance. And Angelina Jolie’s leg caused an uproar while being another much welcomed appearance (even though Angie herself did NOT look her best. To quote Punchie: “Oh no! Why does Angelina look like a half-deflated fuck doll?”) And I quite enjoyed the Ellen/JC Penney commercials.

Overall, the show could have been better, but it could have been much worse. Billy Crystal definitely classed it up this year, but I expected a few more laughs than we got. I’m still pulling for a Kristin Wiig/Maya Rudolph/Tina Fey hosting gig next year. That would be pure magic. But of all the magic moments during the Oscars this year, I’ve gotta say the most magical for me was seeing Best Supporting Actress nominee, Jessica Chastain, in her gorgeous Alexander McQueen Oscar dress. It was at that moment, my heartbeat quickened its pace, my eyes widened and my jaw nearly hit the floor. And at that moment, a new crush was born. (You know it’s bad when the last thing you say to your girlfriend at night as you’re snuggling in bed is: “I have a new crush. Her name is Jessica Chastain. Here, let me find a picture of her for you.” Sorry, Punchie!)

Even though she’s had steady work as an actress for over 8 years, Jessica Chastain seemed to come out of nowhere and shoot straight to superstardom in 2011 when she starred in six movies – three of which were critically acclaimed films - two of which were nominated for Best Picture last night – and one of which she was nominated for.

As Celia in "The Help"

I kind of feel like a jackass for only now just realizing how beautiful and talented she truly is. I think the problem is that I’ve only actually seen one of her movies: “The Help.” But I’ll give myself extra points since it’s the film for which she was nominated. As brassy and voluptuous Celia Foote, Jessica nails the performance and brings the bubbly and charming character to life in a way I didn’t think would be possible after reading the book. (But let’s face it: “The Help” as a whole was such a well-acted and perfectly cast film. It’s actually one of the very few movies that do the book justice). And I’ve seen several clips of her performances in “The Tree of Life” and “Take Shelter.” From what I can tell, it was really just a matter of what film she would be nominated for, because they were all such strong performances and now I can’t wait to actually watch those movies in full along with everything else she’s in.

Jessica in her Alexander McQueen gown.

But let’s get back to that dress. She looked exquisite, almost regal. The perfect combination of beauty, sex appeal and sultriness. And I’m sure the $2 million in Harry Winston diamonds didn’t hurt much. And, as a fellow ginger, I do have a soft spot for red heads. Especially sexy redheads who can pull off such an ornate dress like that. Wowza! And, she’s a born and raised California girl, to boot! The similarities are endless!

With no fewer than six new projects lined up, her fame, popularity and stock will only go up from here. (And of course this little mention on our blog will surely skyrocket her fame to a whole new level. Kidding, kidding. Though we wouldn’t hate it if that were the case one of these days…)

Jessica is having a moment with Kat Dennings.

Glee-Cap: Winter Finale (On My Way)

2012-02-21T21:50:00.000-08:00

Anna Reviews "On My Way"

Okay, I’m gonna review this episode in the order of events that took place. There was just so much going on, so pay attention because this might go kind of fast.

First of all, SPOILER ALERT! There is absolutely no Brittana in this episode. None at all. Sigh… So why are we reviewing it? Well, it’s the winter finale and there was some cray-cray shit going on, especially with gay bullying and the twist at the end. How could we NOT talk about it? Plus, it was just a mindfuck of an episode. So let’s start.

Sebastian:

With insults like “Where is gay Cyclops?” and “Tina Blowin Wang,” Sebastian goes way past the Santana scale of mean. While kind of funny (hehe…Blowin Wang), it’s just plain uncalled for. And threatening to post photoshopped Finn photos, that’s just messed up. I could tell right away what the tone of this episode was going to be. At least Sebastian eventually comes around after the tragic events unfold. But, like Kurt, I was waiting for the punch.

Sue and Quinn:

Sue telling Quinn she’s with child was priceless. To which Quinn responded: “That’s amazing. And confusing.” And I love her.

Sue smiling. Let’s have more of that.

And Quinn rejoining the Cheerios! Takin’ it back to season 1. Old school. Back in the uniform. Love it!

And then comes the rollercoaster of emotions.

Karofsky:

Karofsky walking into the locker room and the look on his face. You just know. You already know what’s written on his locker and you know that shit’s gonna go down. And of course he checks his FB page because when we’re feeling down, we need validation. Unfortunately, that was not the best thing for him to do at the moment because his secret made its way to his Facebook page. And as Dave looked rejected, Punchie chimed in, “That sucks, but it’s karma, buddy.” And then…THAT happened. And we simultaneously let out a “Fuuuuuuuuuuck.” That was heartbreaking. Maybe a little TOO much karma. Quite a contrast to how Kurt dealt with gay bullying. Such a powerful scene. It left me breathless. And as for the song playing over those events, I love, love, love Young the Giant and “Cough Syrup” and I was so bummed about Bland singing it, but I was actually pleasantly surprised. He was actually quite good. Let this day be remembered. I had something nice to say about Bland.

Commercial:

And then there was a commercial for Titanic in 3D!!! (Sorry, just got so excited about that!) Front row. Popcorn. I’ll never let go. Not to belittle what just happened, of course. But…it’s Titanic.

And now we’re back to Karofsky…um…holy shit. He did it? And the flashback of his dad finding him. Was that scene necessary? That was a punch in the gut. Low blow, Glee. That was really hard to watch.

And now Sue is crying. I like her smiling better. More of Sue smiling, please!

And then we find out that Dave is still alive? They probably could have led with that to save us some anguish and confusion. Man, my heart was sinking so low. Stop being so tricky, Glee! You’re making me feel things. The whole suicide thing hit really close to home with me. But I don’t want to get into that. That’s a place I don’t like to go to or think about. At least not right now. But it hit home.

What Santana and Brittany look forward to:

“I’m looking forward to the day my grandmother loves me again.” – Santana. So are we, Snix. So are we.

“I want Lord Tubbington to kick his ecstasy addiction.” - Brittany

What is Anna looking forward to? Why, more sweet lady kisses, of course! Get to it Brit and Santana. We wants you to get your mack on.

Commercial:

And a “Hunger Games” trailer! OMG, the movie freak in me is going insane! See? Sometimes it’s cool not to have Tivo.

Regionals:

Warblers sing. And I’ve already forgotten about it. Except why is Sebastian the leader of the Warblers? He’s mediocre at best.

Then comes New Direction’s “Fly/I Believe I Can Fly” mashup. And Santana rapping. My heart can’t take it. And then Bland joined in and I lost my high. And R. Kelly’s song is so perfectly suited for Artie. A fine performance.

And the Troubletones are back! And Santana sings some more and my heart still can’t take it. Until Brittany joins in and that’s when it stops beating altogether because they are just too precious and I love it when Brit gets a solo! (Especially following Santana). And that’s the most Brittana action we’ve gotten. But the performance, as a whole, is pretty badass thanks to, of course, Naya.

And Lea Michele sings the third song. Oh…Lea…are you still on this show? I totally forgot because Naya’s been overshadowing you all damn season. Ha…and may I add…ha. Yes, that might be a little mean-spirited. I was just getting really sick of hearing nothing but Lea in every song in every episode and I thought we escaped that for a while. But it was a nice break because now I don’t mind her so much anymore. Rachel has really started to grow on me as a character. And that’s saying something because once I decide I don’t like something, it’s hard to change my mind. So…well done, Rachel.

And the winner of Regionals is: Really…was there ever any doubt? New Directions (and the Troubletones!)

Kurt and Karofsky:

Karofsky’s mom telling him he might have a disease and maybe there’s a cure? That’s just poor parenting right there. And then we get a glimpse into Dave’s future. A PSA for “It Gets Better” if I ever saw one. Glee tends to be pretty preachy in its episodes, but this one I’m okay with. Because it really DOES get better. It really, really does. And it’s important for people to know that. Especially the Glee demographic.

The Cliffhanger:

Well…fuck. I’m at a loss for words. (That’s twice in a row, Glee. What up with that?) So…I’m just gonna let Alli take this one. Because…I don’t even…I can’t even. I can’t deal. This episode was just full of gut punches and this one brought me to my knees. All I can say is that I totally agree with Punchie when she said: “Why can’t it be Blaine? We love Quinn!” Truer words were never spoken.

But now I might have to take back everything nice I said about Rachel because she was the one texting Quinn and distracting her. Which led to another PSA. This one about texting and driving. Man, she better be okay. She needs to keep rocking that Cheerios uniform!

And we have no more Glee until April. APRIL!!!! I have a sad. And I’m feeling anxious. I need something to calm me. Since there was zero Brittana in this episode, I’ll just close this review with this. I absolutely love this photo because I adore Bridesmaids. And I love that Brit is Kristen Wiig's character. Too much awesomeness. Almost enough to make me feel better about this emotionally charged episode.

Alli's Reaction to the Winter Finale

Wow. Just…wow. I’m really at a loss for words with this episode and it’s not too often that I’m rendered speechless. Seriously…ask anybody who knows me. I NEVER shut up.

I was so captivated by the entire episode that I didn’t even make notes to myself throughout—which is what I normally do. So, sadly, tonight I don’t have any re-cap quips or lines to reiterate. All I have to offer anybody is this: wow.

This was, by far, one of the most touching Glee episodes I have ever seen. How amazing is it that the writers can take a typically exaggerated and silly show (that we enjoy for those very reasons) and give its audience such deep and heartfelt messages about suicide and texting while driving.

The entire thing with Karofsky’s attempted suicide broke my fucking heart. It was such an honest storyline. I remember when I was teased with things like “dyke” and “fag” when my ‘friends’ first started to suspect my sexuality, and the pressure I constantly felt while trying so desperately to hide the real me from my family. I’d be lying if I said that suicide didn’t cross my mind. I agreed with Mr. Schuester when he said that everybody has his or her own breaking point when it comes to mental health and sanity.

The second they showed Quinn texting and driving I knew something was up. It was a rough way to get a message across to America’s youth, but I definitely think it was brilliantly executed. I know for sure that I will think twice the next time I consider sending a ‘quick’ text while driving. I’m really sad that we have to sit on that ending for SIX WEEKS! I really, really hope they don’t kill off Quinn and I honestly don’t think they will, but holy shit. A cliffhanger for the record books.

I know this episode had basically no Brittany/Santana but we were given something equally as good with its overall message to accept homosexuality and a reminder that bullying CAN do serious damage. It’s not right to tease somebody for something out of their control and it never will be. I truly loved the part where Mr. Schuester had the kids talk about what they’re looking forward to or something they plan to do in the future.

In fact, I want to keep that ball rolling. Coming from a girl who’s survived depression, bullying, suicidal thoughts, and coming out: I am looking forward to one day marrying the girl I love, seeing my baby smile for the first time, publishing a novel, and of course, meeting Anna.

This week I would like to thank Glee for reminding all of us that nothing is worth risking a life.

Pretty Little Liars 2x21 Emily-Cap

2012-02-20T19:36:00.000-08:00

As promised, we had the return of Emily’s old flame and fellow swimmer—Paige—this week. I (Alli) really had mixed feelings about this going into the episode but, I must say, I really enjoyed her return! She isn’t nearly as annoying or psychotic as she used to be! I chalk it up to her coming out to her parents (which she revealed to Emily this episode) and being honest with herself, as well. I mean, let’s face it, a lot of us have been there and it can really mind-fuck the crap out of somebody to try and hold that gargantuan secret inside for too long. Yay, Paige! Progress.

Also, she got rid of those god-awful bangs she had last season. Definitely an upgrade. I thought Paige looked really beautiful in tonight’s episode…which is a HUGE compliment coming from me because I was (okay, I still am) a HUGE Samara fan—therefore, I hated Paige. But now, with the help of stupid avoidance tactics by Maya, I definitely ‘ship’ Emily with Paige (played by Lindsey Shaw) now. Unless, of course, Samara happens to return.

Okay, so here’s a quick breakdown of what happened on the Emily front:

Maya won’t answer or return Emily’s phone calls (because she sucks).

Paige admitted she came out to her parents and was all flirty and googley-eyed at Emily.

Maya still won’t answer and it upsets Emily when she thinks she sees her while getting take-out food (it wasn’t her).

Emily runs into Paige while all upset.

Paige compliments Emily and comforts her.

Emily smiles all adorable.

Paige leans into kiss Emily.

Emily straight up denies Paige (it was brutal).

Paige apologizes.

Emily walks away.

Maya still doesn’t answer (because, in case you forgot, she sucks).

The cops come to Emily’s door at the very end of the episode and say they need to speak to Emily about Maya—end of episode.

Cliffhangers suck almost as much as Maya does.

In other news, Mona is getting harassed by “A” now, too. Spencer’s sister, Melissa, may have had something to do with Alison’s untimely death. There’s trouble on the Aria/Ezra front (as I predicted because I’m the smartest person I know). And last, but not least, Spencer is a giant lush when she’s drunk…I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a little turned on by it.

Only 2 more episodes until we find out who “A” is! #pumped

Pin-Up of the Month: Naya Rivera

2012-02-19T20:32:00.000-08:00

Really. Was there any other choice? Come on. We know this blog is peppered with Naya in many, many of our posts, but that’s only because she is the Empress of Badassery and Hotness. We wanted to do a something a little different for our second official Pinup of the Month post, but after tossing different names around and being unable to decide who to bestow this honor upon, we kept coming back to Naya. Yes, she’s a big part of our blog and yes, we talk about her and rave about her all the time. But we figured you wouldn’t mind seeing as how we’ve never gotten any negative feedback when we discuss Naya. (And why would we? She's awesome.) So we, Alli and Anna, present to you our Pinup of the Month: Naya “Snix” Rivera.

She’s funny, she’s sexy, she’s charming, she can sing, she can act, she can steal my heart with one single glance and her voice makes me want to make love to whatever or whoever is near me. Yup. She’s THAT damn good.

Besides making both of our Top 5 celebrity free pass lists, Naya also captured our hearts by protraying the bitch-in-resident, heterosexually challenged Cheerio who is so madly in love with her best friend, it makes our hearts scream out for her because we know exactly what Santana is going through. After starting off as a secondary character on Glee, Naya soulfully sang and sassed her way to the forefront, now landing her own solos in almost every episode. Hard to believe it took the Glee writers/creators this long to see what we noticed from the very beginning. (Um…anyone remember that insanely hot rendition of Like a Virgin from season 1? Out of the 6 people involved in that number, Naya was the only one that made me swoon and sweat and hit the rewind button multiple times.) In case your forgot, here's a little refresher:

As we watched Santana struggle with her true feelings towards Brittany, we also watched Naya turn in truly solid performances. Every. Single. Episode. Even the dreadful “I Kissed a Girl” episode where I’m sure she was thinking “Seriously? We’re doing this? Okay…let’s go.”

And last week’s Valentine’s Day episode of Glee (the one the left me completely speechless) is what really solidified the already no-brainer decision that she should be our Pinup of the Month. In just one episode, we had so many longing stares and hand holding and cuddling and snuggling and dancing together (not as hot as the Brittango, but definitely sweeter and more romantic). And then…the kiss. Yes, we had the little preliminary kiss by the heart that we all saw in the promos. But then…oh then…we had THE kiss. And even now, almost a week later, I still don’t really know what to say. I mean, there was so much hype built up toward it and I was not at all disappointed. It was sweet, romantic and gave me chills. But it left me wanting more. So much more. Will that be the only kiss we ever get from them? God, I hope not. That’s not enough for us! But the kiss itself was magical. And one that I happen to play on a loop over and over again. The mashup of Cherish constantly running through my head…gah! When Naya tilts her head up with her eyes closed and lingers for a moment before Brittany’s lips meet hers, I think it was in that moment that I died. Because I definitely stopped breathing for a bit. And that moment when Brittany pulls in Santana. I love it. LOVE. IT. You can just tell how much Santana loves Brit. And Naya evokes those emotions so well.

Why this girl has not received a Golden Globe or Emmy nom is beyond me. But we do not fear. Because we know there is MUCH more incredible work ahead for Naya. Whether it’s on Glee or in some other acting forum or recording an album, I know her best is only yet to come.

And that’s how Anna “Cs” it.

Without a doubt, my favorite pic of Naya.

Photo of the Week: Alex Morgan (Part 2)

2012-02-17T14:38:00.000-08:00

Okay, yes. I know, I know. We’ve already featured Alex Morgan as the subject of our Photo of the Week. But is it our fault that she’s smokin’ hot and keeps releasing unbelievably beautiful photos? No. It’s not our fault. So we’re featuring her again. Because this time around, she’s in the pages of the annual Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue. And what’s even better is that she’s showcased in the Bodypaint section. Yes. Her bikini is PAINTED onto her body. And because of that, soccer fans everywhere rejoiced. The way I (Anna) rejoiced when she saved the day during the US Women’s Soccer match against New Zealand last week. The team was minutes away from losing 1 – 0 when Alex Morgan, the youngest player on the team, stepped up (like she always does) and displayed her ability to maintain grace under pressure by scoring not one, but TWO last-minute goals, securing a win for the US.

Alex is a tremendous athlete who, as you can see, takes pride in her body. I was so excited when I heard she was going to be featured in the magazine. Even more so when I realized it was the Bodypaint segment! So enjoy the pic and be sure to cheer on Alex and the rest of the US Women’s National Team at the London Olympics this summer! (And I’m sure Hope Solo will soon find her way into one of our photos of the week. In fact, I can guarantee it).

Alex has had a hell of a year. And it’s only February! Oh, and congrats to Alex, whose name landed on the roster for the 2012 Algarve Cup in Portugal next month. Can’t wait to see what she does there and in London!

Glee-Cap: Heart

2012-02-14T21:45:00.001-08:00

Alli Loves Up on Glee

Best. Valentine’s. Day. Present. Ever.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou! Oh my freakin’ god, FINALLY! For anybody living under a rock or who has yet to watch this week’s glee, you missed this:

Okay, slow down, Alli. Let’s back this up a bit and take it from the top, shall we?

We got adorable dancing and flirting in the first 5 seconds of the show. Loved it.

Then Brittany gave Santana a playlist of songs that she hears in her head whenever she’s with Santana. And in case it was too fast for you to see it was as follows:

Purple People Eater

Disco Duck

Monster Mash

On Top of Spaghetti

Pac-Man Fever

Osama Yo’Mama

Different Strokes Theme Song

Santana thinks it’s as adorable as I do and leans in to kiss her girlfriend but is sadly interrupted by Principal Figgins with a booming, “Teen Lesbians!” The girls are pulled into his office and reprimanded for giving each other a peck (the first Santana/Brittany kiss ever shown) at 12:16 the day before. Santana quickly quips back that the disgusting display that lasted for several minutes starting at 12:17 was worse (Rachel and Finn kissing). Figgins informs the girls that it has to do with some religious disputes and I love, love, LOVE that Santana snaps back by throwing out the term ‘Bible thumper’ and pointing out the insane double standard that exists at McKinley High School in regards to couples. Funny thing, Santana, I was thinking that same thing about this show as a whole for the last two seasons. Weird.

I noticed during Artie’s song to Sugar that Brittany and Santana even sit like lesbians now. Did anybody else catch that!? I’d be lying if I said it didn’t turn me on. Just saying…

A few minutes later, after a super fun song in the quad area, Santana requests that the God Squad (complete with Glee Project’s 2^nd winner, Sam Larson) sing a song to her ‘girlfriend girlfriend.’ I wanted to fist pump and shout out, “Yeah San! You tell that Bible thumper!” But I contained myself. Hands doesn’t like when I’m obnoxious because then she misses funny lines.

At this point in the episode I was thinking ‘holy shit, we’ve gotten more in half of this episode than we’ve gotten in three entire seasons leading up to it!’ But I was careful not to get too excited because I have been let down before and, basically, numbed over the Brittana relationship to the point where I get excited even when I see a little background action (i.e. walking together in the halls).

But that wasn’t all! During Rory’s rendition of “Home” Brittany grabbed Santana’s arm and linked it with hers. Adorable. Dear Glee writers, you really stepped it up this episode and we lesbians are eternally grateful. Now…don’t make this a ‘one and done’ situation. Let’s keep it going into the future!

When Santana looked at Brittany longingly and lovingly in the middle of Rory’s song I thought my heart was going to explode. Naya Rivera is so incredible. She’s so clearly straight in real life but she sells being in love with another girl better than more real-life lesbians do. And it’s all done with her eyes! It literally drives Hands up the fucking wall that the Brittana relationship seems so one-sided on Santana’s side. I usually try to calm her down with chocolates and remind her that Naya Rivera is an incredible actress and Heather Morris is an incredible DANCER…acting is not her number one forte. But maybe my girlfriend is on to something? I’ve heard a lot of people say that they think Brittany isn’t nearly as invested in the relationship. Perhaps it’ll be a good story arc for season 4?

So the God Squad actually has to consider whether or not they will sing a love song to lesbians? Really, Mercedes? Shouldn’t you be proactive about this? I mean, isn’t Kurt your bestie? I actually loved the scene with the God Squad debate of gay couples, though. Especially when Quinn went all Bible intellectual power-house on their asses by listing all the alleged “abominations” listed in the Old Testament. Especially the part with saying that at least one in every ten people is gay, which means there’s a chance that one of the 12 Apostles was gay. Mercedes is guessing Simon…because his name is the gayest. I concur.

We strayed away from the Santana/Brittany story line for a bit, but it came back full swing at Sugar’s Valentine’s Day party when the God Squad decided that love is love and they would, of course, sing to Brittany from Santana. After some adorable strawberry feeding, hand holding, hand kissing, and dancing we got what we waited for this whole ~~episode!~~ ~~season!~~ series! Yes, ladies, Brittany and Santana kissed. And not just a peck. A full-on lip lock. Brittany even wrapped her arms around Santana’s neck and deepened it for good measure. I have nothing but love for this moment. Nothing. But. Love. I may or may not have pushed the rewind button a few times. Only like ten. Okay, twenty. Shut up.

I think this was valid proof that even though kissing each other’s hands is cute, kissing on the lips is better.

Okay, I haven’t even begun to comment on all the other awesomeness that was in this episode, so I will try to cover it quickly!

First, Sugar is hilarious and I love her. The whole Rory vs. Artie thing was entertaining and endearing. Although, I must admit, I’m Team Artie all the way and I’m sort of pissed that Sugar chose Rory—especially when it’s so clear that he’s lying about leaving the United States.

I felt like Rachel’s dads were a little over-the-top, but I did enjoy their attempt at reverse psychology with Finn and Rachel’s engagement. It really disappoints me that in the very first episode of Glee we were shown a picture of her dads hanging in her locker and one of them was black and now they’re both white. Come on, Glee. We’re more observant than that. I did LOVE, however, that they sneakily got Rachel and Finn to fight over a nightly poop. Hilarious. And such an honest fight topic for couples who are new to living together!

I really liked that we got to see Karofsky again. I like him more than Blaine. That is all.

Okay, so everybody is thinking it, and I’m going to say it: Mercedes and Sam break my fucking heart. I’ve been pulling for them since last season’s finale. But tonight, Mercedes’ rendition of Whitney Houston’s “I Will Always Love You” literally moved me. I had tears in my eyes and goosebumps all over my body. Now there’s a chance that I just got caught up in the Whitney-ness of it all, but damn…damn. Mercedes nailed that song. Every single note.

Speaking of songs, the music in this episode rocked my face off. It was so upbeat and fun! I love it when they sing in the quad because it always seems so big and awesome. And even though I hate Blaine, “Love Shack” made me want to get up and dance around the apartment. I wanted to be at that party so bad!

Best Quotes:
1. "No single people at my party. They’re sad and boring.”—Sugar

2. “Mr. and Mr. Berry…”—Finn

3. "He’s like a Teen Jesus.”—Sam

4. “I sawed through them like a frickin’ sex tornado!”—Puck

5. "Just pick up the girls that fall off ol’ Puck-a-saurus over here.”—Puck

6. "Wheel me to class, baby!”—Sugar

7. "I support your decision to be unhappy with Finn for the rest of your life.”—Santana

8. "We’re in glee club…we sing to gay people all the time.”—Sam

9. “Maybe God wanted to talk about gay people but didn’t want to hurt Simon’s feelings?”—Sam

10. “I said to LeRoy, ‘this guy sold us the wrong lube. That’s why the rubber is squeaking. That’s why it feels so weird when we start going really fast.’” –Tall Dad

“What are you talking about?”—Curly Dad

“We’re talking cars.”—Burt

Anna Is Rendered Speechless...For Once

“Teenage Lesbians!”

Okay. Let me just preface this by telling you all I’m quite drunk right now. Punchie and I reached the bottom of that bottle of pink champagne mighty fast.

So now that that’s out of the way, let’s get down to it. I initially just wanted to make my review this: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But I figured maybe I should actually say words. Or type them. We finally got our kiss. And it wasn’t just that little peck they showed in the promo. It was a full-on lip lock. And it was really just the sweetest moment. My heart and stomach dropped suddenly like I was on a roller coaster. And the entire episode leading up to that moment was packed full of Brittana cuteness, I could hardly even stand it. The cuddling, snuggling, nuzzling, hugging, and let’s not forget the dancing. The DANCING! The dancing that led to the kissing! My head is reeling. Truly. I really wish I had Tivo so I could just rewatch that moment over and over. For now, I’ll just replay it in my head. And perhaps one up that and imagine the PDA they share when they leave the party. (And by PDA, in this case, of course I mean Private Display of Affection.)

I’m seriously so blown away by that kiss. I want more. I’m always gonna want more.

I know this is a short review. Hell, it’s not even a review. It’s just my thoughts on something I’ve been waiting to see for so long. And now that it’s actually happened, I guess I’m kind of speechless. Which is weird. Because I love words. I guess I’m just a little emotional right now, too. And I guess I can’t really add much more. Alli pretty much covered it all (even the way Brittany and Santana sit.) Anyway, we did it. We finally got our kiss! Let the fan videos commence!

Alli's Pretty Little Liars Emily Re-Cap

2012-02-13T20:31:00.000-08:00

Happy Monday, everybody!

Don’t you just hate when people say that? The first person I saw at work this morning (at 7:45 in the fucking morning) smiled and gushed, “Happy Monday, Ms. (insert my last name here)!” I felt like Ron Livingston from Office Space and my ‘case of the Mondays’ attitude didn’t get me anywhere but shitsville today.

However, there was a saving grace. Yes, you all know what I mean (mostly because it’s in this posts’ title). It’s Pretty Little Liars night! And boy (or girl…I don’t judge), it was a good one!

As promised, I will give Emily (the hot lesbian character) re-caps as well as little tidbits on the other characters and what is happening thus far with the story.

Was it not just last week that I was bitching about how Emily’s girlfriend, Maya, is totally dragging her down? It’s like I somehow had developed a medium and knew this week’s events were going to unfold as they did. Or…my simple little mind probably just picked up on the show’s foreshadowing tactics for once….

….Whatever. I can see the future.

Anyway, on with the story. Maya is basically history as of this point—or at least that’s how I see it. I try my best to stay away from spoilers for this show because I really like the mystery behind it all so I am not 100% sure if she’s really gone or I’m just wishfully speculating.

Here’s what went down:

Maya was acting all weird when Emily paraded into the school with her massive swimming trophy. She made a sign for Emily, which was cute, but then acted all awkward and basically ran away.

Then we have a seemingly out-of-place scene where we get a glimpse of Maya talking to Jason DiLaurentis. (Which I’m sure is not out-of-place at all and is going to add up to something much larger in the foreseeable future.)

Then, Maya tells Emily that her parents found one of her old joints from before she was sent to True North (the juvenile center she was sent to for pot in the first season) and they threatened to send her back.

Emily looks sad and if I wasn’t so busy doing a happy dance at the prospect of Maya leaving I would be sad, too.

Fast forward to Emily’s swim team party that night and we hear Emily commenting on how Paige is like a “rocket” while watching a video of her swim. Since I’m getting so good at this foreshadowing stuff I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that this is a hint for us Emily-lovers that Paige will be back.

…and I also read a spoiler that literally said, “Paige will be back.” I know, I know…I just said less than a minute ago that I try to avoid spoilers. I also try to avoid lying and look how well that goes.

Paige...who we may be seeing a lot more of...?

Meanwhile, Maya is sulking on the steps over being caught with pot and she has a vulnerable moment where she asks Emily to leave with her (to which Emily denies her haha) and I almost—ALMOST—felt bad for her…until 2 minutes later when Emily caught her smoking pot on the deck outside. It’s like she was trying to get caught. Duh.

Maya gets defensive when Emily immediately confronts her and says that Emily is just better at fitting in and wah wah wah…I stopped listening…until she suggested that Emily run away with her. Maya was denied for the second time this episode and we may have finally seen the last of her.

Unless she’s “A”…dum dum dum (dramatic music).

And the final scene showed ‘A’ watching Emily talk on the phone through a window. *Shudder* It was creepy.

Five quick comments on other characters/storylines:

1. Hanna and Caleb might be my favorite straight couple of all time. They are so adorable together…and both so ungodly attractive. I would have a 3-way with them. Yep. I said it. You were thinking it.

2. Aria chose watching Holden fight over meeting up with Ezra…is this, again, foreshadowing for what’s to come of their relationship?? Ezria shippers beware! I smell trouble.

3. Am I the only one who thinks it’s weird that Garrett was dating a high school student and he’s probably, at least, 23-years-old? Why has nobody commented on that yet? Aren’t we supposed to assume that Jenna is sixteen? Maybe I’m way off base.

4. This episode was great because there were so many close calls! I was on the edge of my seat the whole time. Okay, okay…I was lounging on the couch. But I wasn’t blinking! It was that intense. Especially with Aria, Ezra, and her father trying to catch them, and with Spencer and Hanna trying to figure out how to hack into Caleb’s computer so the cops wouldn’t incriminate him.

5. I loved that Hanna knew immediately that the file with all of the illegal downloads “A” planted on Caleb’s computer was the one entitled “Hefty” (in regards to Hanna’s former ‘weight problem’). A stab to which she quipped, “It’s the one titled ‘Hefty’…bitch.” –And in case you can’t tell yet, Hanna is my favorite. In a perfect world I ship Emily and Hanna. Sigh…that would be so nice.

The previews for next week said that there’s an all-day marathon leading up to the new episode; which means it would be an ideal time for those of you who haven’t seen the show or are just starting to get into it (cough Anna cough) to catch up! No excuses. There’s a marathon.

Someone Like Adele

2012-02-13T14:21:00.000-08:00

Sorry we’ve been m.i.a. for the past few days. Things just got a little nuts for us. But don’t worry. We’ll be back with a lovely, brand spanking new Glee-Cap tomorrow! For now, I (Anna) just wanted to take a moment and pay tribute to one of the most astounding voices in music today. As we say goodbye to one beautiful songstress (We love you, Whitney), we welcome back another with open arms.

Let me preface this by saying I’m not Post-Grammy Adele bandwagoner. But I am a post “19” Adele bandwagoner. When “Chasing Pavements” was released, I was like “Okay. That’s a song. And I like the voice and it’s very different and that’s great.” Then I heard her rendition of “To Make You Feel My Love” and thought she did an incredible job. But I didn’t really get into Adele until the release of her record-breaking album “21.” I, along with everyone else who doesn’t live under a rock, fell in love with her powerful and sultry voice. Every single song on that album is phenomenal. Most albums, I’ll skip at least one or two tracks, but that’s not the case with “21.” “Rolling in the Deep,” “Set Fire To the Rain,” “Someone Like You,” “Don’t You Remember,” every single one of those songs makes me kind of wish I was going through a breakup at the time the album came out. Just so I could curl up on the floor, rocking myself back and forth to her poignant lyrics or binging on ice cream with tears streaming down my face. But now that she has recently said she wants to start writing happy, in-love songs, maybe Punchie and I would have a new romantic song to sing to each other besides Twista’s “Badonadonk” or Busta Rhymes’ “I Love My Bitch.”

I’m so, so thankful that Adele’s voice made it’s delightful comeback on the Grammys Sunday night. What an incredible, powerhouse performance. Alli and I agree it was the best of the night. By far. While other performers had flashing lights and crazy dancing and whatever the fuck it was Nicki Minaj was doing, Adele had her voice and a microphone. And that was all she needed. She looked so stunning and her voice was just perfect. And that moment right after she finished as she was getting her standing ovation with her doe-eyed look of modesty and appreciation…it just made me melt. Adele is talented, sexy, sweet, and can write words that speak to the hearts of everyone who listens. She’s unapologetic and refuses to compromise in order to conform to what society considers to be “sexy.” And that’s what makes her beautiful in our eyes.

Welcome back, Adele!

Photo of the Week: Callie and Arizona

2012-02-09T15:03:00.000-08:00

Love is in the air on tonight’s Valentine’s Day-themed episode of “Grey’s Anatomy.” So we decided to dedicate our Photo of the Week to our favorite Grey’s couple: Callie and Arizona. It’s been a season of pure wedded bliss for these beautiful ladies and we’re hoping the writers keep it that way. And let’s hope they don’t revisit that “What If” episode where Callie was with Owen and had three kids – two of which seemed to be straight out of “Village of the Damned.” That was some really weird shit. I (Anna) did love that Calzona constantly argued with each other in the episode and ended up sharing a cute moment at the end.

Anyway, back to tonight’s episode. It’ll be full of the dramatic twists and turns we’ve all come to know and expect from “Grey’s,” but from the looks of this picture, it seems Calzona’s story will be the most adorablest of them all! Callie has a surprise planned for Arizona and by the look on Arizona’s face, it’s either really appalling (in a not so great way) or really unexpectedly sweet. I’m going to guess it’s the latter. Because I’m an optimist. And how cute is Arizona’s face here? Makes ya wanna go, “Ishaboo boo,” doesn’t it? No? Is that just me? Whatever. I’m not ashamed to direct baby talk in the direction of a cute couple. I just adore Jessica Capshaw to pieces. Hell, I love them both. And I can’t wait to see what surprise Callie has for her lady. I’m hoping it gets her laid. On screen. What? Who said that?

Glee-Cap: The Spanish Teacher

2012-02-07T21:37:00.000-08:00

Alli Hashtags Her Way Through "Glee"

Well…no Brittana tonight. Santana had some good scenes, but really nothing to get too excited about. I loved it when she said “wanky” and got incredibly excited when she was singing and dancing in a way that reminded me of Jennifer Lopez in Selena. In the end, she was the voice of reason reminding everybody that without passion you can’t succeed. Santana is a bitch but she keeps it real, therefore, I love her. #duende

I’m really starting to hate Mr. Schuester. You CAN’T be a Spanish teacher and not even know the Spanish word for “ears.” Also, you can’t just switch from being a Spanish teacher to being a History teacher. I cannot stress this enough: ITS NOT POSSIBLE TO BE A TEACHER IN A SUBJECT UNLESS YOU’RE ENDORSED FOR IT! And having the History Channel does not count as endorsed. I’m less than a year away from having my teaching license for secondary English with a specialty in Special Education and this show’s lack of accuracy is aggravating as shit.

You know who really shined this week? Kurt. He had a hilarious ‘twinsies’ moment with Rachel, gave us an adorable reaction to the ever-so-gorgeous Ricky Martin, and even mentioned having a synced period with Rachel and Mercedes. Hilarious. And, he gave Finn the relationship advice that I was screaming at the end of the episode last week—don’t throw your life away for a high school relationship. Kurt, you owe me a “twinsies!”…and you’re a way better character without ol’ what’s-his-face dragging you down.

Side notes: I really love the Sam/Mercedes dynamic. Sugar’s reaction to Ricky Martin was fucking hilarious. The whole scene about the football boys washing their junk made me incredibly uncomfortable…and I really didn’t understand half of what they were saying. #gaygirlproblems

Best Quotes:

1. “Baby gravy.”—Sue

2. “I won’t stop till it’s trending.”—Sam

3. “Wit who’s vagina! Sue, you can’t have no baby! You old as the hills. You won’t give birth to no child. You gon give birth to a gran-child!”—Nene Leakes…I really don’t know her character’s name

Overall, the best thing about this episode was the preview for next week’s show. You all know what I’m talking about. Yep…most Brittana action I’ve ever seen was in a commercial. #fail

After my friend, Heather, saw the preview she immediately texted me and said this: "If [a peck] is all we get, I am done with glee forever. Kurt and Blaine practically suck each others dicks every week and we get a peck." #word

Anna Says "Meh"

Glee! You’re KILLING me yet again. Do I really have to sit through all this nonsense just for the only storyline worth watching? Especially if it wasn’t even part of the episode? Alli’s right. The best part of this episode was the preview at the end for the next episode. Ya know…the kiss. How friggin’ excited am I for next week? Well…let’s just say it’s Valentine’s day. And I don’t have Tivo. And my gf is working late. Sounds like a threesome with Ben and Jerry and Brittana…actually, I guess that’s a fivesome. (And don’t worry, Punchie and I will be celebrating V-Day at a later time. The romance is NOT dead in this house).

Now back to this week’s episode. It was another dud. I mean, there’s been worse and there’s been better, but well…I’m gonna try to keep it positive because there’s already enough cynicism about Glee, especially on the Brittana front. We know there was none in this episode, and we’re bitter, but faith must be kept. And if they screw it up next week, we can wreak havoc.

Can I just say that I love that Santana has been in the forefront lately? I love it so so so much. Naya’s is probably the only career I will follow after this show. I want lots of albums recorded and lots of movies starred in.

Brit was pretty fun in this episode, even though she barely spoke. Yet again. But her dancing in the otherwise lame-ass “Sexy and I Know It” was priceless. Particularly when she was spread eagle on the chair the same time Mike’s arm was sneaking through the middle of his chair. Sexy sex sex. Very suggestive. That’s not how I want Brittany to be associated with sex. A guy? Ugh…heteros. And how much did I adore her weekly Brittany-ism? “Oooh, I’m bi-lingual.” The delivery was perfect. We know what you thought you meant, Brit. Wink wink, nudge nudge.

So for the most part, I was rather blasé about this ep, but here’s what I loved:

-There were some funny moments in the episode. Nene Leakes did have some pretty funny lines. And Alli, fyi her name is Roz Washington.

-Loved how everyone was so in love with Ricky’s character. Artie was entranced, Quin was taken by him, Kurt was enthralled. Even Sugar tried to show off by doing some pushups. (In case you haven’t caught on, I heart her.)

-The “All About Eve” reference from Sue. That got me all kinds of excited because it’s one of my favorite movies. I know, I’m a nerd. But it’s the little things that excite me.

-Brittany’s sexy cheer dancing. That was fun times!

-Kurt saying, “Our periods don’t come until the end of the month.”

-Sam and Mercedes. Starting to dig that. It’s cute.

And of course:

“La Isla Bonita” – The dancing, the thigh high boots, the short shorts, and all kinds of yumminess. God damn, Naya owns that stage. And her voice…well, it wouldn’t be a proper Glee review from me if I didn’t bring up her singing. Is it possible to have sex with someone’s voice? Well, if not, I’ll just have to have sex while listening to that magical voice. Inappropriate? Don’t care. Naya. Can. Sing. (I used periods after every word. That’s how you know it’s serious).

So, I’m pretty sure next week I’ll be much more enthused one way or another. I want my Brittana mack!!! The snippet they showed in the promos cut off just before their lips met. You bastards.

Pretty Little Liars--Some Background Info

2012-02-06T20:09:00.000-08:00

So there wasn’t much Emily gay action in this week’s episode but there were a lot of revelations on the mystery front—which is almost just as good. Almost.

I feel it’s important to play ‘catch-up’ those of you who are not adamant watchers but feel the need to start watching (ahem…Anna). So for this week I will give a little back story on the overall plotline that has developed thus far.

Here are the basics:

--Spencer, Emily, Aria, Hanna, and Alison were besties.

--Alison was a puppet master of sorts and controlled the other 4 girls by manipulating them on a regular basis. She was also the ‘queen bee’ of their high school.

--Alison mysteriously disappeared and was discovered dead a year later (the Pilot episode).

--During the year in which Alison was missing the girls drifted apart and each began receiving anonymous text messages that discussed long-kept secrets amongst the group of friends. Each text is signed “A”…which the girls believe to be Alison until her body is discovered and they realize that somebody else knows their secrets and is terrorizing them.

--The girls reunite at Ali’s funeral and realize they’re all tangled up in a web of lies, deceit, and blackmail by ‘A’.

--There are two over-arching mysteries for the show: who is ‘A’ and who killed Alison?

--In search of answers the girls try to piece together any clues they can to solve the mystery.

Character Breakdown:

Aria Montgomery (played by Lucy Hale)

--Moves back to Rosewood with her family after a one-year absence in Iceland after the disappearance of Ali. Her family is dysfunctional as a result of her father’s extra marital affair and her brother, Mike, feeling the need to break into all of her friends’ houses and steal from them. Aria is having an affair with her former high school English teacher, Ezra Fitz (former because he took a job outside the school in hopes of keeping up the relationship with Aria).

Hanna Marin (played by Ashley Benson)

--Takes Alison's place as “Queen Bee” at Rosewood HS after Alison's disappearance. She used to be ‘fat’ (as Hollywood would see “fat”) until Alison disappeared and then she slimmed down. Her mother is involved in a secret embezzlement scandal with a bank (which ‘A’ uses to torture Hanna) and her father was recently remarried—earning Hanna the step-sister from hell, Kate. She’s currently in love with school bad boy, Caleb.

Spencer Hastings (played by Troian Bellisario)

--Super smart perfectionist who’s family lived next door to Alison’s family before the disappearance. Spencer lives under the expectations of her uppity family and is tormented by “A” for her tendency to ‘steal’ her sister’s boyfriends. Currently in love with, but not dating for his own safety, Toby (Jenna’s step-brother). And we learned this week that her dad had an affair with Alison’s mom and Ali’s brother—Jason—is actually Spencer’s half-brother, also.

Emily Fields (played by Shay Mitchell)

--Openly gay and really close with Alison when she was alive; “A” uses outing Emily in the first season to harass her. When she did actually come out her mother didn’t take it very well and was successful in getting her first girlfriend (Maya) sent away. Her parents are now accepting of her sexuality. Emily is the star of the Rosewood HS swim team and currently dating Maya (again).

Alison DiLaurentis (played by Sasha Pieterse)

--Ringleader of the girls before her disappearance and death. She was very good at manipulating the girls into believing they were very special to her and could trust her with their secrets. She was a big bully in school and often tormented the less popular kids, like Mona and Lucas (Mona became Hanna’s BFF and popular after Ali’s disappearance; Lucas is the school ‘nerd’ and has always harbored feelings for Hanna).

Okay, so that’s all I have for you right now. Perhaps next week, if there aren’t enough lesbian moments to mention, I will break down the potential suspects that we in the story have so far.

As for spoilers, I had mentioned that I read that Paige was going to be returning this week; either that prediction was off or I read it wrong because there was no Paige in sight. So I went searching for the spoiler again and fell into a plethora of spoilers for the finale! Apparently Paige will be returning but not until the last couple episodes…if not the very last episode of the season. Also, the identity of ‘A’ will be revealed! Somebody will be arrested and somebody will die. Any guesses as to what will happen to whom?

I know who the original ‘A’ is in the books…but will it be the same?? It’ll be interesting to see how much the show follows the book.

Now everybody yell at Anna for not watching PLL on a regular basis. Bad, Anna. Bad, bad Anna.

Alli explains why Pretty Little Liars is worth watching

2012-02-05T19:24:00.000-08:00

Hi all, Alli here. I hope that everybody is as excited as Anna and I for the promised ‘make-out session’ between Brittany and Santana in the upcoming Valentine’s Day episode! As we not-so-patiently wait for that epic Tuesday night I am here to bring you some similar entertainment in the form of an ABC Family gem.

Pretty Little Liars.

Yes. I said it. Pretty Little Liars.

It’s my biggest guilty pleasure.

Unlike most teenage-based shows, PLL has never hidden the sexual orientation of the character Emily—played by the beautiful and talented Shay Mitchell. Not only has the fact that she’s a lesbian been clear from the Pilot episode, but she has also had numerous women in her life since.

Some of you may be scratching your heads and wondering, “Pretty Little What and Whos?...What the fuck is Alli talking about here…nobody goes looking for lesbian action on ABC Family!”

I understand your confusion. I was in that same frame-of-mind when a dear friend of mine suggested that Hands and I watch the show.

Regardless of my apprehension, I decided to watch an all-day marathon in June last summer that was leading up to their summer premiere. And I have been hooked ever since.

IMDB.com describes the plotline as follows: “Four friends band together against an anonymous foe who threatens to reveal their darkest secrets, whilst unraveling the mystery of the murder of their best friend.”

There is, obviously, a lot more depth than that tiny description but it’s actually quite hard to describe the overall story without getting into each of the 4 main characters’ back stories…and then also their current stories and the over-arching plot having to do with the anonymous bully who controls it all.

The show is based off a series of books by Sara Shepard—which I have, sadly, not read. But I plan to! I know that the character of Emily is a lesbian in the books, too, so I am interested to see how Shepard writes her. If any of our readers have read the books and can give me some insight as to how Emily is portrayed in the books as opposed to the show, please email or comment below! I’m truly interested. Most importantly: are there sex scenes and are they hot?

Okay, back to the show. I don’t have the will-power nor the time to get into each of the four main characters so I’m just going to focus on Emily for this post and possibly give insight to the other 3 girls in future posts (because I do plan on giving re-cap/updates on the show as new episodes roll in).

To date, Emily has had four girls in her life that have been potential love interests.

Emily and Alison

First, Alison. She is the ‘murdered best friend’ that was referred to in the plot description earlier. We only see her through flashbacks in Emily’s mind and it’s pretty clear that Emily had feelings for her that were never returned. However, Ali knew of Emily’s harboring crush and used it to manipulate her.

Emily & Maya in a photo booth.

Second, Maya. Maya and Emily’s relationship seems to be fans’ favorite. I do NOT like Maya. She’s rude, stubborn and always causes problems. She came around at the beginning of the first season, stole Emily’s heart, and then was shipped off to some sort of juvenile camp when Emily’s mom turned her in for possession of marijuana. Maya has returned for the 2^nd half of this season and she and Emily just exchanged their first “I love you” last week. *Insert eye roll here.*

The ONLY thing I like about Maya is that the writers and network seem to have no problem showing her and Emily making out. Seriously. They get the hottest scenes on the show. Last week I nearly fell off the couch in shock after watching Emily lower Maya on to a bed and straddle her.

If you don’t believe me about the level of hotness please feel free to check out the two video’s below. The first is of Maya and Emily’s first date and how they make the movie theater more interesting. The popcorn dropping to the floor gets me every time. The second video is from last week’s episode where audiences got not one, but TWO, make out scenes…the 2^nd one leading to the aforementioned bed-lowering straddle. Enjoy.

Then there was Paige. Paige was on the swim team with Emily (did I forget to mention that Emily is a big-time athlete? Oh yeah…she has that going for her, too). Paige came around after the whole ordeal with Maya getting shipped off. Paige is terrified of coming out of the closet and she’s kind of an annoying bitch.

Emily & Paige kiss in Emily's bedroom.

Emily broke things off with Paige when she resisted being open about their somewhat-relationship. Hey, at least it’s realistic that Emily wouldn’t fall in love and stay with the first girl she ever kissed. I read a rumor online that Paige is returning for the end of season two. I hope not. Unless it means she’s replacing Maya. Then I hope so.

Samara & Emily

And, finally, Samara. Oh, how I loved Samara. Not only was she completely adorable, but she was also so supportive of Emily with EVERYTHING. The show barely ever showed the two girls in a loving way and it made me so sad when they broke up. I still have my fingers crossed that Samara will come back into Emily’s life. She’s truly been the best one.

Emily & Samara.

Even if the show doesn’t bring back Samara I am totally excited to see where Emily’s storyline will go in the future. It’s really nice to have show that I can count on to be at least a little bit unbiased when it comes to the screen time of straight couples vs. gay couples. After this last episode where I got to see TWO passionate lady kisses within the one-hour timeslot—as opposed to ZERO kisses in three full seasons *cough glee cough*--it really makes me wonder why I get all excited for ‘potential’ kisses between Brittany and Santana when I can just watch ABC freakin’ Family and get all the lesbian fulfillment I want. Well…not all. Let’s be honest. I’m needy.

In short, big kudos to ABC Family and Pretty Little Liars for having the guts to not only give us a lesbian character but also follow through with her story line.

Photo of the Week: Naya and Heather and Sweet Lady Kisses

2012-02-02T12:42:00.000-08:00

It’s all happening! (I love it when I get to quote “Almost Famous.”) So according to E!, they have a very reliable source that Brit Brit and Auntie Snix will FINALLY seal the deal. You’d think this would mean having the sex, right? Well, no. That ship has sailed without us even being able to witness it. It means that finally, after all the teasing and suggestive comments and TALKING about sweet lady kisses and TALKING about taking baths together, they are set to share their first on-screen kiss together. You know…with lips actually touching lips. Not necks. It will supposedly take place in the Valentine’s Day episode. E! goes on to say that the Brittana story line is: "sweet and it's romantic and it will satisfy fans." And, according to the source, it’s not just a kiss. It’s a full-on make out. I mean, take it with a grain of salt, but if it’s true and Brittany and Santana really do get their mack on, I have 2 stipulations.

1. It better damn well be worth it. I mean, it really better be a full-on make out session and not just a peck on the lips. We’ve waited too damn long for a simple peck.

2. It better further their relationship and actually have it develop a little more than it has been this season. I want lovey-dovey pillow talk about how into each other they are.

Part of me wants to say, "I'll believe it when I see it." But apparently Heather, herself, said: "There will be a lot of kissing for me and Santana. Naya and I had to do it over and over and over again." Man, I wish I could have been on the set that day. How lovely would that have been?

Alli and I have often talked about how obvious it is that Santana is crazy in love with Brittany and how it seems Brit, while deeply caring for Santana, might not feel the same. Well, I don’t want that in this episode. I want love. I want romance. I want a hot, steamy kiss that would put fan fiction writers to shame wondering why they hadn’t thought of that kind of kiss before. Even if it’s just for this episode. It’s the Valentine’s Day episode, damn it! I want Cupid’s arrow to hit Brit square in the ass. And I want fucking fireworks between them. And a cute little love song duet. What can I say? I’m a born fuckin’ romantic.

To read the full story on E!, check out the link below.

http://www.eonline.com/news/watch_with_kristin/glee_spoiler_bomb_anyone_want_see_naya/290903#ixzz1lAZvGnbe

Now, in honor of this blessed news (that damn well better be legit!) we are dedicating our photo of the week to Brittany and Santana. It’s actually two recent twitter photos of Heather Morris and Naya Rivera prepping for the Valentine’s Day episode. These pics are enough to make my heart go pitter pat and sigh seductively while resting my chin on my hand as I stare longingly at this adorableness. Hope you enjoy the shit out of the pics the way we do!

Heather and Naya and a little candy hear that says "Teen Lesbians."

Glee-Cap: Michael

2012-01-31T21:43:00.000-08:00

Alli's Glee-Cap on "Michael"

It’s a little hard for me to compete with Anna on this episode recap. She is, by far, the biggest MJ fan I know. Even though I am an MJ fan myself, I am in no way equipped to go toe-to-toe with her on this one. As a result, I am going to leave all of the musical numbers to Anna and I’m going to break down the episode as a whole.

A Blaine solo starting the episode? Always a bad idea. Seriously, how many times do Anna and I have to call him ‘Bland’ and make fun of his stupid outfits before they just write him out of the show? What’s that you say? None of the Glee writers read our blog? Okay, fine. Still…he sucks. And he told the Warblers about singing MJ at Regionals! Life ruiner. I’m glad you got slushied.

On a brighter note, how awesome was Quinn this episode? I was so, so happy that she was accepted into Yale and has the prospect of a brighter future. But what does this mean for next year?? I know that
Dianna Agron hasn’t been confirmed as returning next season yet…so was this our insight as to what her exit will be? It makes me kind of sad…I really do like Quinn. She’s super cute and gives Rachel the best
advice about not letting an anchor of the past following her into the bright lights of her future. Awesome, Quinn. I couldn’t have said it better myself.

On that note, Rachel is selling herself short for Finn! To all of the young girls out there: do NOT compromise yourself for your high school sweetheart. Ever. Don’t get me wrong, I thought the “I Just Can’t Stop Loving You” duet was cute and I was touched when Rachel said yes, but I was a THOUSAND times more excited at the end of the episode when she revealed to Kurt that they are both NYADA finalists. Whoo! I smell a college story arc a brewin’…Please do not let me down next season, Ryan Murphy. I’m begging you. It’s already so, so hard to stay devoted…especially when ABC Family has ZERO problem showing 2 girls making out. Sad.

We barely got to see Brittany this episode but when we did she was her usual quirky-self. Body checking a Warbler at the beginning of the “Bad” number was hilarious. Seeing her sitting completely spread eagle
after Quinn’s solo was a little weird…but still funny nonetheless. And, of course, our weekly ‘Brittanyism’ with telling Santana that she doesn’t know how to lock the door. Was it enough Brittany? No. Was it ‘filler’ Brittany? Yes. Are they selling her character short so they can write her off next season? Probably. It’s kind of our luck. But maybe they will get a lesbian storyline right the 2nd time around. I would like to make it public knowledge that Ryan Murphy should feel free to call me in to audition for Santana’s new girlfriend at any point.

You know who’s a thousand times better male lead than Blaine? Artie. And tonight I found out that his first words were “hot damn.” I will just add it to my ‘I Love Artie’ list along with the freak-out speech he gave Mr. Schuester. You go, Artie. I’ve wanted Artie and Santana to sing a duet since the show started and the fact that I finally got my wish with an MJ song is just absolutely amazing. “Bad” was badass. I don’t care how dorky that sounded.

Speaking of Santana...she is the only fucking reason I am even watching this show anymore. Naya’s voice literally carries everybody else when she’s a featured singer. The two best songs tonight, in my opinion, were Bad and Smooth Criminal—both because of her. I can’t freakin’ wait for her album to come out.

Top 5 Santana Moments:
1. She calls Sebastian a Twink.
2. “Well you’re in luck because Auntie Snix just arrived on the Bitchtown Express. Now my suggestion is to gag him and drag him downtown to a tattoo parlor for a tramp stamp that reads ‘Tips Welcome’ or ‘Congratulations, you’re my thousandth customer.’”
3. She calls Kurt ‘Prancey Smurf.’
4. She said the word “underboob”…like 5 times. It made me picture her underboob. And I was happy for the first time since this episode started.
5. “If Kurt would have taped this to his junk I would have never heard the end of it…we would have had a whole week of songs about it.”

As a whole, this episode was all over the place and incredibly disappointing for me. Last week’s episode was good and gave me so much hope for the 2nd half of this season that I think I got a little ahead of myself. I must admit, though, that I’m still pretty pumped for next week’s episode with Ricky Martin. Glee is a vicious cycle of emotions for me…I get excited and then disappointed almost every week, it seems. I threaten to stop watching but will I ever actually stop? No. I’m weak…and a sucker for cheesy musicals.

Anna's Glee-Cap on "Michael"

Okay. Let me start this out by stating emphatically that I was, am, and always will be a hardcore Michael Jackson fan. And when I say “hardcore,” I mean it in every sense of the word. His music has been a part of my life since I was two years old. In high school, I would pull up in the parking lot blaring his music with my windows down. Yeah, I’d get teased about it, but I didn’t care. I own every single one of his albums (along with every Jackson 5 and The Jacksons albums), I’ve got tons of MJ collectable memorabilia, and my room was covered in MJ posters and pictures growing up. I even have a Michael Jackson tattoo. And as of right now, it’s the only tattoo I have. Yes, I love Michael. And I was devastated when he died. Lots of tears and lots of Xanax. I still have a hard time hearing his songs without getting monumentally depressed.

So when I learned that Glee was doing a Michael Jackson tribute episode, I was immediately skeptical and very torn. My love for MJ is something that is so special to me and so private and so important. And my love for Glee, as great as it is, doesn’t even compare to Michael. Especially since my faith in the show has been wavering so much lately. If they can’t get a simple storyline right (*cough* Brittany/Santana *cough*) how can I expect them to do MJ justice? But I went into it with an open heart and open mind. And a box of tissues…just in case.

The whole episode was severely disjointed. All the musical numbers just came out of nowhere and didn’t move the plot forward at all.

What I Loved: Santana

Why do I love Santana? Because:

“I’d throw this mocha in your face, but it’s not NEARLY scalding enough.” (Her reaction to Rachel “not getting” what MJ was about.)

“All right, twink, I think it’s time I show you a little Lima Heights hospitality.” (one of her many slams toward Sebastian.

“Auntie Snix just arrived on the Bitchtown Express.”

“You may look like the villain out of a cheesey 80s high school movie, but you should know that I am fully prepared to go Danny LaRusso on your ass.” (another burn on Sebastian.)

“I was better.” (Yes, Sanata, you totally kicked his ass on that one.)

“Underboob.” Yup.

What I didn’t love: Rachel

Rachel, my love/hate relationship with you is getting a bit old. You completely redeemed yourself in my eyes last episode when you sang “Without You.” And then you go and say about MJ that you “never really got what he’s about”????? This week I hate you. I hate you hard. I want to love you next week, so you better bring you’re A-game and stop saying stupid things.

Since this was a subpar episode lacking all things Brittana, I’m just gonna break down the musical performances and then call it a night. Here we go:

Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’ – As you all should know by now, I hate Blaine. Just hate. He’s annoying and pretentious and dull. Bland, as I like to call him, took this classic MJ song and turned it into a complete cheese fest. With his lame face and googley-eyed expression, I shuddered and cringed through the entire number. So…we’ll just leave it at that. This number gets a D (only because I loved everyone’s MJ outfits at the end…especially Brittany’s.)

Bad – Oh my, this was quite cheesy. Why did I enjoy it? I don’t know. The dancing was a lot of fun and I thoroughly enjoyed Naya’s solo. And Brittany just looked so badass. She and Santana probably went home right after that and had some adrenaline-filled sex. I’m just gonna say they did that because Glee sure as hell isn’t gonna show us. Hmm….I’m gonna give this one a B.

Scream – Artie just gets up and walks! Haha…that was cool. But the song as a whole…me no likey. They just completely used the MJ/Janet video. Where did this come from? I mean, I know it was in Artie’s head and all, but…it just didn’t work. If they’re gonna use MJ songs, especially one as powerful as “Scream,” you need to really make it your own. Not just copy another man’s genius. The dancing was fun with Mike and seeing Artie out of his chair was cool. He can move, but I’m giving Scream a D.

Never Can Say Goodbye – A perfect song for Quinn. And it’s nice to actually see her get some screen time! But you really don’t need to change the “girl” to “boy.” We know you’re not gay, Quinn. It’s okay. (And congrats on getting into Yale! You work it, girl!) But all-in-all, I’m gonna give this one a B+.

Human Nature – Another beautiful MJ song. I like that it was a duet between Sam and Mercedes. And I liked the acoustic guitar. Very different. Very simple. And their voices harmonized very well. And ending on that kiss was all kinds of cute! I’m gonna give Sam and Mercedes a B.

Ben – I love that Kurt sang this. It’s so perfect for his voice. We did NOT need Rachel and Finn joining in. It should have been just Kurt singing to Bland. Alone. Just the two of them. Finn’s voice ruined this number for me. It just didn’t fit in.

Smooth Criminal – Now THAT’S what I’m talking about! Santana/Snix faces off with D-Bag Sebastian to “Smooth Criminal.” This is one of my favorite MJ songs and when I heard Naya would be singing it, I was beyond ecstatic because I knew she would rock it. Now, perhaps I sound biased because I love Naya so damn much, but do I care? Not really, no. But I’m actually not being biased. The girl can sing. And this arrangement of SC was pretty badass and the fact it was just 2 cellos (played very astutely by 2Cellos) made it even more badassier. And, let’s face it, Naya is sexy as fuck in this number. That one moment she’s sitting, staring down Sebastian and crossing her legs…well, let’s just say my girlfriend, Punchie, is probably getting laid tonight. She can thank Naya for that. I give this performance an A+.

I Just Can’t Stop Loving You – I said it a few posts back. I wanted this song to be a duet between Brittany and Santana. So the fact that it’s between Finn and Rachel, well…how do you think I feel about that? Yeah…not happy. It was just so-so. Whatever. I mean, MJ has so many other beautiful love songs. So I’ll let Finn and Rachel have this one and Brittana can duet on “Speechless” or “You Are My Life.” Finchel gets a C on this one.

Black or White – I’m so glad Artie had a lot of solos this episode. Not so happy about all the Rachel-ness. And love all of Santana’s screentime. And Kurt singing “Don’t tell me you agree with me when I saw you kicking dirt in my eye.” You know…cuz Blaine got rock slushi in his eye. I see what you did there, Glee. Very clever. And OMG, the morphing at the end! That had me actually laughing out loud for a minute straight. Very funny stuff. But, the cheese factor lowers the grade to a B –.

I didn’t tear up. I guess it’s only MJ’s voice that elicits that reaction from me. The episode was filler. And there was no Brittana. None. At all. Woe is me. Santana was the saving grace in this episode…like she is in every episode. We love you Naya. Thank you for doing right by Michael.

Wouldn't it have been nice to have actually seen this scene?

Our Top 15 Evan Rachel Wood Moments

2012-01-27T17:22:00.000-08:00

We continue our Evan Rachel Wood Week with Alli and Anna's top 15 favorite Evan moments. Hope you enjoy the show!

15. Evan Tweets Alli and Anna @allthegaythings

We can’t make this shit up. We literally had JUST posted our first write-up (over the Jessie and Katie relationship) and tagged her in the Twitter link. Then this happened:

14. Evan Poses for Flaunt Magazine

So…THIS happened. Really no description necessary. Just enjoy.

13. Sizzling Hot Gucci Ad

Evan got super steamy with Chris Evans in this Gucci commercial. And for the straight girls reading this, let us repeat these two words: Chris. Evans. Not bad, eh? Seriously hot stuff. Warning: start running the cold shower now so you can jump in right after viewing this.

12. Jessie Sammler’s Speech to Her Mom in “Once and Again”

In the final episode of “Once and Again,” Jessie comes to a realization about her relationship with Katie and offers her mother these words of wisdom when it comes to her own relationships. These are cherished words to live by. Truly.

“I just think that sometimes things happen between people that you don’t really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong. And those are the ones that change your life.”

11. Evan’s Golden Globe and Emmy Nomination

It’s been a red hot year for Evan with her nominations for her portrayal of Veda in “Mildred Pierce.” And though she didn’t win (we call shenanigans!!!) she did put in a lot of face time all the awards shows, which led to some stunning dresses and perfect photo ops. It’s so great to Evan having such a wonderful year professionally and personally.

10. Evan’s Performance in “Mildred Pierce”

As Veda, she sings. She acts. She gets naked. And we salute her.

9. True Blood

Although her guest-starring role was short-lived we still got a glimpse of Evan as sassy, lesbian vampire Sophie Anne—the Queen of Louisiana. Audiences first see Evan’s character while she is ‘feeding’ off the inner thigh of a smokin’ hot girl. It’s fun to watch.

8. Evan Sings 4 Non Blondes

…and while doing so, she knocks our friggin’ socks off. She took the stage in Venice at an after part for “The Ides of March” premiere and sang the shit out of “What’s Up” by 4 Non Blondes. Evan, will you please record an album, already???

7. Running With Scissors

Evan is one of the best things about this whole dysfunctional movie. She’s cynically sarcastic and often dressed in skimpy outfits. Be sure to check out the scene where she and Augusten beat the ceiling in with broom sticks…Alli’s exact words were, “Hello legs…”

6. “Wake Me Up When September Ends”

A spectacular performance from Evan and it just so happens to be the video shoot where she met her beloved Jamie. All together now, Awwwwwwww.

5. Evan’s Bieber Impression

This one is more up Alli's....uh...alley. Anna doesn't have Bieber Fever, but Evan does a hell of a Justin Bieber. Here she is singing "U Smile" at a karaoke joint. Also, check out her interview with Jimmy Fallon where she busts into "Baby."

4. Blackbird

We always knew Evan could sing, so when “Across the Universe” came out, we rejoiced and hit up the front row of the movie theater with popcorn in our hands and a song in our hearts. Evan + Beatles = pure bliss. She had so many great songs in this film, but her beautiful and haunting rendition of “Blackbird” sent chills down our spines.

3. Evan Reveals She’s Bisexual

Well, she didn’t exactly use the term “bisexual”, but Evan granted the biggest wish our hearts desired when she revealed that she has dated both girls and guys. It was the news we had been waiting for for years. Anna texted Alli the moment she heard the news and they celebrated and did a little Cabbage Patch dance. Synchronized happy dancing 1,500 miles apart. She told Marie Claire, “I can't say I'm one way or the other because I've honestly fallen in love with a man and I've honestly fallen in love with a woman. I don't know how you label that, it's just how it is."

She also told Esquire Magazine: “I'm more kind of like the guy when it comes to girls. I'm the dominant one. I'm opening the doors, I'm buying dinner. Yeah, I'm romantic."

Uh…Evan? We’re here. We like dominance. We like dinner. We like romance. Actually, Anna lives pretty close to you (just fyi). But Alli would probably be willing to make a location change. Just sayin’…

2. Evan’s Entire Performance in “Thirteen”

We had to make this our number two Evan moment because her performance in this movie was truly acting at its finest. It’s impossible to watch this film and not be blown away by every moment Evan is on screen. Her portrayal of Tracy Freeland, a seemingly normal and well-adjusted thirteen-year-old girl whose life slowly spirals out of control after meeting new best friend and bad influence, Evie, garnered Evan a well-deserved Golden Globe nomination for Best Actress. The film is deeply affecting and at times, hard to watch, but if you haven’t seen it, we suggest you Netflix it or Redbox it or download it in iTunes right away. You’re missing out on some seriously stellar acting.

1. Jessie and Katie’s Kiss in the Attic

We know what you’re thinking: how many times are these girls gonna drone on and on about Jessie and Katie? Well, the answer is: ALL the times!!! We make no apologies when it comes to our obsession with Evan’s portrayal of Jessie Sammler and Mischa Barton’s portrayal of Katie Singer on “Once and Again.” The confusion they felt, the tension that built up, all of it culminating to that life-altering kiss in Jessie’s room in the attic…Gah! It really gets us every time. And from then on, we owed everything to this couple and these actresses and that magical moment they shared on screen. They became a part of us. Forever.

Photo(s) of the Week

2012-01-25T15:22:00.000-08:00

Evan Rachel Wood sure sent Anna and I into a tailspin on Monday when she started replying to fans on Twitter by answering questions, giving advice, and just simply enlightening us all with her thoughts. Not only did she reply to people, but she would reply to the same person more than once! And she kept this up for hours on end and answered questions about past relationships with girls, a love for Princess Jasmine, and most importantly—her role as Jessie Sammler.

I figured she was being flooded with replies so I decided not to personally tweet her, but Anna and I did give her a shout out for being so inspirational and a pivotal role model in both of our sexual discoveries. However, if I DID tweet her it would have been something like “@evanrachelwood If things don’t work out with my gf, I’m going to pursue and charm the pants off of you. Literally.”

Anyway, as a tribute to Evan (again!) we are going to make her the photo of the week. Except, how does a girl pick just one ERW picture? Easy. You don’t. You pick 10.

That’s right. Ten pictures to prove to readers that Evan Rachel Wood is undeniably gorgeous.

1. She’s hot as a blonde.

2. She’s beautiful as a brunette.

3. She can even rock red hair.

4. She’s adorable when she looks innocent…

5. …And so incredibly hot when she’s not-so-innocent.

6. She is gorgeous with long hair.

7. And sexy with short hair.

8. She’s a better vampire than Rob Pattinson.

9. She makes me want to be a straw in can of Coke.

10. And makes lesbians all over the World jealous of Jamie Bell.

Okay, one more for good measure. Aww…it’s Jessie!

Evan Rachel Wood’s Tweets Make Everyone Feel Good All Over

2012-01-24T11:55:00.000-08:00

We’ve had a VERY fun and exciting surprise yesterday when our girl, Evan, began tweeting responses to her fans’ questions. We don’t know what we loved more: the fact that she was offering advice to those in need, discussing her experience in dating girls and finally telling those close to her, or the fact that she discussed “Once and Again” and what she thinks would have happened to her character! (Gotta admit…I – Anna – was pretty damn excited about that last one.)

There are countless reasons we love Evan Rachel Wood. Her unapologetic honesty and ability to raise the self-esteem of her fans are just more reasons to add to the list. And because of all that, we’ve decided to make this week: Evan Rachel Wood Week! Yay!!!

Evan spent most of yesterday tweeting back and forth with her followers about any and all subjects. Whether it was what her idea of a perfect woman was – the answer was Princess Jasmine. How can you not love that? Or what was the best advice she received as an actress – “Don’t sleep with your costars.” Or just general questions and comments about self-esteem: “I was the pale too skinny girl with no boobs and braces in school. Awkward. Couldn’t get a date and most girls tortured me.” Dude…if Evan had self-esteem issues and turned out this awesome, then there’s hope for all of us.

Some other gems from Evan on self-esteem:

“Hold on to your integrity and your true self. Don’t let all the bells and whistles fool u. Do what inspires you. Take chances.”

“Just dive in head first. Don’t be afraid to get it wrong. And find what makes u happy.”

“You can’t love someone else or let someone love you or feel worthy of love until you love yourself. #thesearefacts”

Man, as if we didn’t already love her enough, Evan has now moved up 100 points in the Cool Factor for being so damn down-to-earth and so real with her fans. She was even open and honest about her relationships with girls in the past, even revealing that she had her first girlfriend at the age of 12. Oh, if only we had been so brave in jr. high!

Evan on her sexuality and coming out to her family:

“Everyone was really supportive. I came out to my parents when I was 21. They were kind of the last to know.”

“It was mainly weird cause it’s always weird talking to your parents about anything that involves sex.”

“One parent had to get used to the idea. But now we laugh about it. Cause it was so obvious.”

And then there were the tweets that sent us into a damn near tailspin. If you’ve been following our blog, then you know that Evan helped play a huge part in both mine and Alli’s coming out. Her character, Jessie Sammler, along with Mischa Barton’s character, Katie Singer, on “Once and Again” gave us the strength and comfort and that little push we needed to be able to truly accept ourselves. Mind you, it took a few years after the show ended. That’s when we revisited the storyline through the wonder of Youtube and remembered why it affected us so much the first time around. And, of course, our love for that storyline led me and Alli to “meet.” So really, we owe Evan (and Mischa) a lot.

The show ended ten years ago. (Wow…starting to feel old). And those characters are still with us, in our hearts and on our brains. Particularly Jessie, since we watched her grow up. And the fact that, ten years later, Evan is now tweeting about this beloved character…well, I couldn’t be more ecstatic. These are some tweets that send our heads spinning:

Evan on Jessie Sammler:

“One of if not my favorite character I’ve played. It helped me too. In many ways.”

(On that infamous lip-lock with Mischa Barton’s character) “yea. Gotta say I did not mind them doing 15 takes for that scene. ;)” (this was where our heads collectively exploded)

(On the episode where said kiss aired): “That episode was banned in Virginia or Kentucky. Either way, two people fell in love and an entire state couldn’t bear to watch it.” (FYI, it was Virginia. So sad.)

(On where she sees Jessie now): “I see her being a therapist, actually. For kids. And she sings on the side. And of course has her ranch.” (This is where I die. Jessie has her ranch! )

(And my personal favorite, when asked: “Any clue as to what would have happened to ur character in season 4 of O&A? Your season 3 storyline kinda changed my life.”) Evan responded: “They wanted Katie to leave Jessie. But I said no. It wasn’t right. Your welcome. Hehe”

And there you have it. Evan stood up for her character and for the integrity of the storyline between these two girls who were just trying to discover who they were and what they meant to each other. Just goes to show that it really doesn’t get much cooler or much more badass than Evan Rachel Motherfuckin’ Wood.

Sadly, as she states, she’s “off the market.” I guess that’s good. That way Alli and I won’t be throwing down and fighting each other over her. No fisticuffs for us. And that also means our girlfriends won’t get jealous seeing as how she’s number one on both our “celebrity free pass” lists. We love you “Hands” and “Punchie!”

Stay tuned for more Evan-related posts later this week. And have a very happy ERW Week!

Alli Discusses the Lesbian Subtext in 2 Broke Girls

2012-01-23T11:32:00.000-08:00

AfterEllen.com has this wonderful way of recapping TV shows (‘snap caps’) with what they refer to as “Gay Girl Goggles.” Gay Girl Goggles (or GGG, as I will call them) is the concept that gay women can watch any TV show and manage to find a lesbian subtext—usually with one of the hottest characters. Hands can vouch to any of you that I am probably the worst offender when it comes to this. The writers at AfterEllen.com are completely brilliant and hilarious when it comes to these SnapCaps so be sure to check them out at some point if you haven’t already.

Currently, one of their most popular GGG shows is CBS’ 2 Broke Girls. The show follows the developing relationship of Max and Caroline—two girls who are young, poor, and trying to make enough money to start their own cupcake business. Max, played by the hilarious Kat Dennings, was raised poor and is used to living paycheck-to-paycheck and struggling to make ends meet. Caroline, played by the adorable Beth Behrs, is an ex-socialite who was raised in wealth, then dumped on her ass after her father’s embezzlement antics become public knowledge. To make some money, Caroline takes a waitressing job at the same diner Max works for. Max soon realizes that Caroline is homeless and takes her and her horse—Chestnut—in as roommates in a one bedroom apartment. The idea for the cupcake business develops and everything else since has been in an effort to reach that goal.

Now, allow me to slip on my goggles and break down this subtext for you. The chemistry between the two characters is undeniable. Dennings and Behrs play off each other in a way that reminds me of myself and my ‘close friends’ in high school and college. I’m sure most of you know what I mean. It’s a flirty, giggly relationship with lingering hands and sexual jokes.

Speaking of sexual jokes, they have not been in short supply. There is at least one reference to the girls being a couple or into each other every episode. In one of the early episodes we got to see Caroline drunkenly climbing into Max’s bed with her at night. That same episode she climbs into bed with her sober and they are hilariously interrupted by Max's ex-boyfriend--who of course asks them about being lesbians. In a later episode, when Caroline finally ‘builds’ her own bed, Max makes reference to it as the ‘vagina bed.’

Of course, for every gay joke, there are 3 or 4 penis jokes to supplement them. But I still find this to be very lesbian-ish because Hands and I make penis jokes all the time. We find them especially hilarious because we don’t have to deal with penis on a regular basis...or on any basis since we both decided to stop masquerading as straight girls a few years back.

Also, Max and Caroline’s story really feels like a love story. They start off kind of shaky and un-trusting but then both do something to prove their loyalty is to each other and nobody else. For example, Max’s first boyfriend tries to sleep with Caroline and she turns him down and tells Max about it. And when Caroline is ever in over her head with spending problems and fear, Max calmly comforts and never abandons her. It’s one of those ‘I don’t want to like you but I can’t help it’ things. Plus, the relationship feels an awful lot like a marriage with a kid (the kid being the horse, of course); they argue over seeing their child, they argue over money, they confide in each other, and at the end of the day—it’s still the two of them working toward their future.

Now, in all honesty, when I take off my goggles what I see is a mediocre show about two best friends. The acting is okay. The jokes can be a little racist and demeaning. Sometimes the writing feels forced. And yes, I said it, they are just friends. I make the same sexual jokes with my straight friends. I can easily sleep in the same bed with one of them and not have it be sexual. And I would care for and support a friend in the same way Max and Caroline do for each other.

But my theory is this: why live in a mediocre, straight world when I can just simply slip back into my goggles and see beautiful lesbians who tease audiences into a make-believe world that we can enhance by our own means of ‘shipping’ through fan fiction and YouTube videos? Hell, we’ve been doing it for three years with Glee. Yeah, I said it. I don’t take it back.

Pin-Up of the Month: Kaley Cuoco

2012-01-19T20:20:00.000-08:00

Well, since I (Anna) recently discovered the amazing awesomeness that is “The Big Bang Theory” and subsequently realized the epic hotness of Kaley Cuoco, we wanted to start a little feature called: “Pin-Up of the Month” and because she is so very extra special, we wanted Kaley to be our first entrant.

Man, I don’t know what happened, but somewhere between "8 Simple Rules and “The Big Bang Theory,” Kaley got HOT. Like scorching. I originally wanted to call the feature: BBOTV (Extra points if you can figure out that stands for.) But we opted for a more respectful and tasteful title: Pin-Up of the Month. I want whoever dresses her on the show to dress me. She wears the cutest clothes and those clothes give her the bangin’-est boobs. Seriously, there has been MORE than one occasion when my gf and I are watching the show and she comes on screen and we simultaneously look at each other and say, “Boobs.” Oh yeah, Barney Stinson-style.

Now, I’m not trying to demean or objectify Ms. Cuoco in any way. She is a great actress and I’ve followed her career since “8 Simple Rules.” I’m just stating the obvious and getting it out of the way before I get to why she deserves to be our first Pin-Up of the Month. Because, of course, it’s not all about looks.

Kaley has quite the resume and she is funny as hell, cute as can be, and has finally found her niche by portraying Penny – the aspiring actress/Cheesecake Factory employee extraordinaire and across-the-hall neighbors of Leonard and Sheldon. Now, to some, Sheldon and Leonard are geeks, and to some they are geniuses, but to Penny…they’re both. But they also become her friends. I love the dynamic of her character paired with them because she could not be more opposite of them. But she puts up with their eccentricities and even falls for one of the loveable nerds, thus becoming one half of Pennard.. And she even briefly smooches it up with Mayim Bialik’s character, Amy! A fun and cute moment that had me cracking up (if you watch the show, you know why.)

I'm so glad she has found all this success. It's well-deserved. We love you, Kaley, and we can't wait to see all the amazing work you're gonna do!

Kaley posing for Allure Magazine.

Glee-Cap: Yes/No

2012-01-17T21:34:00.000-08:00

Alli's Glee-Cap

Oh how I wished I wouldn’t have listened to silly ol’ Anna when she told me over the weekend that there was a Glee spoiler released from TV Line stating that Brittana fans would be ‘hitting the rewind button…a lot.’ I was way too overzealous because of it. Well, unless that supposed moment was a loving look or a lack-luster hand holding shot, he or she got it oh so so so wrong. Now, by this point, us faithful Brittana fans will take whatever on-screen action we can get and that locker room scene (Yay, locker room! It’s like they were speaking directly to us!) was totally adorable and heartfelt. Santana’s singing is always flawless and Brittany’s goofy-hesitation-while-drinking-a-water-bottle-but-really-making-lovey-eyes-at-my-hot-girlfriend routine made my heart happy.

However, it’s quite clear to me that this TV Line spoiler writer is NOT a lesbian—or even remotely aware of the lesbian community—if he or she thinks a loving stare or touching hands sends us into a tailspin. I mean, come on! You’re talking to the same group of women who, not so long ago, were avid viewers of a little show called The L Word. And, because of that, nothing that Glee does with gay couples will shock us. Ever. Not to mention, for the last 4 years we have had the wonder that is Callie and Arizona every Thursday night on Grey’s Anatomy who gave us full-fledged kissing right from the get-go.

I get especially peeved with this show and the poor direction of the Brittany/Santana dynamic when Rachel and Finn are given an intimate (and kinda hot) make-out scene in front of the entire glee club, yet Brit and San can’t even kiss in private!? So. Dumb. And on top of all that, one of the two scenes we were given was so incredibly dull that it’s hardly worth mentioning. Yes, we got to see them holding hands (yet, again!), but did anybody else catch the look on Brittany’s face!? She was as bored as I was with it.

Through all of this, however, Naya Rivera and Heather Morris have been nothing short of amazing. Especially Naya. Even if the writing and direction aren’t there quite yet, at least the acting and attempt at showing us something profound and affectionate has been respectable. Kudos to them. Double kudos to Naya for looking so hot in her black get-up.

As far as the rest of the episode goes, here are the top ten things I liked (in no particular order):

1. Opening the episode with a Grease number—Awesome.

2. “Is that a mohawk, Noah Puckerman, or did somebody glue a squirrel to your head?”—Becky Jackson

3. Becky’s thoughts are voiced-over by the Queen of England

4. Finn’s daddy drama—I liked seeing this depth added to his otherwise bland character

5. ALL of Emma’s scenes. So heartfelt.

6. Sue shows her sentimental side for an entire episode! I adore the shit out of Jane Lynch. The Sue/Becky scene made me cry.

7. Artie taking a face-first wheelchair dive into the pool…laughed so hard I almost had an asthma attack. Artie always has been and always will be my favorite male character on this show.

8. Rachel singing “Without You” to Finn. I don’t normally dwell on the Finchel relationship, but this, in my opinion, was one of the best Rachel songs ever. She didn’t oversell it and it was really sentimental.

9. Emma said yes!

10. Cliff-hanger ending leading into the Michael Jackson tribute episode? Yes, please.

Anna's Glee-Cap

There’s really not a whole lot I can add to Alli’s sentiments about this episode. She pretty much nailed it. But I will be so kind as to share my opinions on the parts and characters that stood out to me, starting with the two most important people, of course.

Brittany – She was adorable in Summer Nights. But not featured enough in the episode. She didn’t even have a fun line! We didn’t get our weekly Brittany-ism!

Santana – So much love for all things Lopez. Her singing in this episode, as always, rocked my face off. And I love that she’s totally outshining Rachel because she’s ten times better.

Sugar – Oh Sugar. God, I love her. Her reaction to Will announcing he was going to propose was priceless. And when Artie asked to perform with her – “You’re really just not my type.” Uh…yeah…cuz you’re gay for Santana…or at least you will be soon enough. If things don’t work out with Brit, I’m officially shipping Santugar. Maybe then we’ll actually get some sweet lady kisses on the show.

Artie – I laughed so hard when he wheeled himself into the pool. And him dating Becky and hanging out with her because he genuinely likes her – Artie is a class act. I’ll forgive him for singing Moves Like Jagger.

Becky – I love that she thinks in a British accent (Helen Mirren!). “I absolutely rock.” That was awesome. And her relationship with Sue in this episode was perfect and very sweet.

We Found Love and the proposal – Even Sue got involved! And the swimming sequence is one of those numbers that reminds me why I started watching “Glee” in the first place. Fun and campy and cheesy and…fun!

Now to the negative. And it’s always always always NOT ENOUGH BRITTANA.

During “The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face” I adored the fact that Santana sang the line, “the first time ever I lay with you, I felt your heart so close to mine.” I actually envisioned her first time with Brit because you know that’s exactly what she was thinking about. God, Santana loves her so damn much. You can see it all over her face. But does Brittany lover her back? I just don’t know! Are you in or out, Brit??!! It was a sweet moment, but rewind-worthy? Well, I don’t have Tivo, but if I did, I don’t think those three seconds were rewind-worthy. It was a lovely look. We'll leave it at that.

And yeah, the hand holding was really sad to see and Brit did look bored. That hurts my heart. Santana just looked so damn happy and Brit looked so…ambivalent. Elie Wiesel was right. “The opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference.” The writers are effing KILLING me with this bullshit.

I’m not the only one who got frustrated. About halfway through, my GF had had enough. She scoffed and took off in a huff saying that this show hasn’t done anything to grab her attention in 2 years and, while the Brittana thing is fun, it’s not enough to keep her interested. So…there’s that.

Our next Glee-Cap will be all about MJ and, as the biggest Michael fan around, you can bet I’ll have lots to say about that. Santana! Smooth Criminal! (But I’m still so torn about the rest of it…)

Photo of the Week

2012-01-15T22:37:00.000-08:00

Well as I (Anna) am winding down from another whirlwind Golden Globes awards show, I thought I’d come home and write all about what I thought of the show and all the dresses and cleavage and fun moments (Tina and Jane’s penis joke! Piper and Buffy on stage together! Jenny Shimizu tweeting about how hot ex girlfriend Angelina looked and stating that she’d “do it again”! Naya! Claire! Evan Evan Evan!) I was all prepared to give my two cents on the show.

But then a little thing popped up on my twitter newsfeed from photographer Tasya van Ree (you know…Amber Heard’s girlfriend). It was a link to a photo called “Inspiration: Two Girls Part II” along with the caption “Now pick your jaw up off the ground.” How did she know that’s exactly where my jaw ended up? So I had to post it right away. Because a photo like this should not be kept secret from the world. Now Tasya’s been recently featured on our Photo of the Week post before, but she’s just so damn good, we had to post this new one. Just take a moment to look this photo over and appreciate it for all its glory. It’s such an intimate and sensual shot. I really have no other words to describe other than: hot – which was actually my girlfriend’s immediate reaction when I showed it to her. It’s currently the wallpaper on my computer. Thank you, Tasya, for all your incredible and stunning work. I’m always blown away by your photography.

Photo by: Tasya van Ree

Alli's Favorite L-Word Character

2012-01-13T19:22:00.000-08:00

Dana!

Although her stint on the show was only a far-too-brief three seasons, she was the character that left the biggest impression on me. From her insecurities about being an ‘out’ lesbian to her problems with her family and the emotional struggle with cancer—she had so much depth with her character that one would have to be made of stone to not fall in love with her.

In the first season Dana (played by the gorgeous and talented Erin Daniels) falls for the lovely Lara Perkins, a quirky Sous Chef which Dana mistakes for ‘Soup’ Chef. I loved their relationship. They had some damn hot kissing/sex scenes and amazing on-screen chemistry. I loathed the writers when they broke up and Dana quickly became engaged to the kill-yourself annoying Tonya at the end of Season One and beginning of Season Two. However, not before Dana made an incredibly awkward attempt to have a one-night stand with the equally annoying Jenny Schecter—which actually turned out to be quite comical.

Luckily, the Tonya relationship didn’t last long. But, it wasn’t all in vain. Because of her, Dana did come to terms with her parents and being open about her sexuality—a topic which utterly terrified her for most of the first season and ultimately led the loss of Lara. In fact, one of the biggest reasons I related to Dana was due to her distant, yet close, relationship with her parents. I know that doesn’t really make sense unless you’re a person who has gone through such a situation and perhaps I will try to further explain in my coming out story (which will be posted sometime in the near future).

Dana’s relationship with Tonya overlapped slightly with the one she had with Alice for the remainder of Season Two. Let me break this down for you as simply as I can: Alice plus Dana equals totally fucking hot…and their ‘first time’ is one of the hottest L-Word sex scenes. Don’t argue with me. I won’t have it. If you haven’t seen it, do yourself a favor and YouTube it. You won’t regret it. Anyway, this relationship is the basis for my love toward Dana’s character. And it’s also why Alice is a close second place. Dana and Lara had great on-screen chemistry, as I mentioned before, but it is no comparison to the explosive passion one can feel every time Dana and Alice shared a scenes.

And just in case there are some of you out there who have yet to watch L-Word I will not spoil what happens to Dana and her relationships in Season Three—although I’m sure you can guess from my opening paragraph. Just make sure you have tissues. Lots and lots of tissues.

In the meantime, get a chuckle out of this adorkable scene from Season One, Episode One:

Photo of the Week...and then some.

2012-01-10T18:04:00.000-08:00

Hello all, Alli here. This week I chose a still of Tina and Bette from L-Word season 1, episode 1 because I simply adore this couple. Although neither of them are my absolute favorite L-Word character (stay tuned for that!), they are still a representation of what I want for the future. When I originally saw the very first episode of this lesbian-based drama and was introduced the wonder that is Bette & Tina (Tibette), it was the first time I ever considered that it was possible for a gay couple to have a life that was so, well, normal (for lack of a better term). When audiences first met the couple they owned a house together and were trying to have a baby. It was beautiful. I specifically chose this picture because I love the coziness of it all. A young, hot couple who are completely unafraid to cuddle while reading the paper on their front step…I am so envious of that! And now I’m dedicated to get it, myself. To the writers and actresses that gave lesbians the TV couple who told us, “Yes, ladies, you CAN have it all”—I say, thank you.

...and then some:

As a bonus this week I'm also going to give a sneak peek of how Anna and I talk to each other via text messaging. And might I add that this is not an uncommon occurance...we're always this funny.

Anna: If we write it, they will cum.

Alli: I see what you did there. With the cum. Can’t pull one over me, I’m too damn smart. And as a side note: love the cum joke.

Anna: I like it when you bring subtlety to the forefront and harp on the obviousness. Well played.

Alli: Thanks. *takes a bow* We should post some of our text convos. They can get pretty ridiculous sometimes.

Anna: Too bad we don't have our past drunk convos.

Alli: For real. Those would be comical. Or our old, old emails.

Anna: Do you have any of those? I have some, but not all.

Alli: If i could remember that fake email I used then I probably would have them all. Unless it's disabled.

Anna: alextipton1219@yahoo.com

Alli: You would.

Anna: Don't judge me.

One more thing:

Courtesy of Dorothy Snarker and her blog “Dorothy Surrenders” we came across this absolutely wonderful YouTube video entitled “Shit Straight Girls Say…to Lesbians.”

We all have those friends that say shit like this to us. I, personally, probably average 3-4 comments a week. My favorite is the "that guy is creepy, pretend to be my girlfriend!"...or when a friend tells me that their cousin's roommate's sister's friend is a lesbian--"do you know her?" Yes, straight ladies, us gay girls have a secret society where we know virtually every lesbian in existence!

Enjoy.

…and be sure to visit Snarker’s blog at http://www.dorothysurrenders.blogspot.com/ and remind her how freakin’ hilarious and wonderful she is!

Anna's Coming Out Story, Part 2

2012-01-08T22:38:00.000-08:00

So if you’ve read the first part of my story, I know it was kind of a downer. But now we’re at part 2. And this is where things get…interesting. And fun!

So after the pain of my divorce and in the midst of all the confusing feelings I was having for other girls, this is right around the time I just got plain stupid. I went a little nuts, got a little drunk and ended up having a brief fling with a guy I worked with. And this guy was much older than me…20 years older, to be exact. But he LOOKED young, and acted young and made me laugh. And I thought I was mature enough to handle a little fling like this. Turns out, even a few years after you hook up with someone you work with, it’s still awkward seeing them around work because all you’re thinking is “you saw me naked.” It was during this little tryst when I started to finally ask myself “What the hell are you doing, Anna?” I don’t know what I was trying to prove hooking up with this guy, but it wasn’t working. I was still thinking about girls. And now, it was all the damn time.

The first person I confided in was my best friend, Jenny*. I knew I couldn’t harbor these feelings any longer without telling someone about it. It’s not something one can go through alone. Jenny and I had known each other since high school. She was a bridesmaid at my wedding and even let me crash on her couch after Mark left me. We’ve been through a lot together, but I was still terrified to tell her. I had no idea how she would react. I sat her down and, while avoiding eye contact at all costs, sheepishly told her that I think I might like girls. Her immediate response was something along the lines of, “Okay. Do you want to go to a lesbian bar? Let’s go to a lesbian bar!” And that there is why Jenny is my best friend. I had ripped off the bandaid and because of her, there was no sting. And she did end up doing her research, finding the most popular lesbian bar in the area and went with me, all the while encouraging me to go up to different girls and start talking to them. That was definitely an experience. Maybe I’ll write about it in a post called “My First Time at a Lesbian Bar.”

So things with Jenny went over well and for a long time, she was the only one who knew my secret. She was so supportive and I couldn’t have asked for a better person to help me through it. The night at the lesbian bar wasn’t a success, so Jenny convinced me to join an online dating site to make it easier for me to find girls who were interested in other girls, since I have absolutely no gaydar whatsoever. I ended up messaging a girl named Kate* back and forth (whom you’ll remember from my “first kiss” story). She was beautiful and funny and our first date was pretty damn awesome. After our first date and first kiss, I came to the realization that I was pretty much gay. And after our first time…well…it was official. I was 100% without a doubt into girls. And only girls. I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t concentrate, but it was all in a good way.

So I decided it was time to tell a couple more of my friends. I took two of my closest friends out to lunch and told them that I had met someone…and that it was a girl. I went to high school with both of them, as well, so they had known me for years and had only known me with guys. I think they were a little more shocked, but did their very best not to show it. They also gave me their full support and made me feel ten times better about the whole situation. Soon enough, I found out Kate was a bit of a -- for lack of a better word -- nut job. And that whole thing ended shortly after it began. It did, however, change me. Because of her, I finally knew and accepted my true self.

For a while, those three friends where the only people who knew about me and that was enough for the moment. But when I met my current girlfriend, whom I like to refer to as “Punchie,” that was when I knew it was time for more people to know. We had been dating secretly for about a month when I had arranged a dinner to celebrate my birthday and invited my closest friends so I could introduce them to Punchie. She was a little freaked out when the final head count for my dinner was 22. I believe her exact words were: “Twenty-two? You have twenty-two ‘closest friends’? I have to meet twenty-two of your closest friends?!” I kinda just shrugged and said “They’ll love you.” Of course I had told them about her before hand. It required a lot of time on the phone and a lot of “Hmmm” and “I see” from them. I had one friend that when I called her up and told her, she was quiet for about thirty seconds and said “Are you happy?” To which I replied “Yes.” And she said, “Well okay then. What time is dinner?”

There were several extremes when it came to my friends’ reactions. I had one friend that I took out to coffee and after I told her, she replied, “Yup. That sounds about right. I’m glad you finally figured it out.” I actually had a few of those reactions. Damn. I thought I had hidden it so well. And of course I had that one friend that was just adorable and clueless and asked all sorts of questions: “What’s it like to kiss a girl? How do you have sex? But…you’ve always dated boys. How is it better? How is it different? Do you use toys? How is it sex if you don’t use something?” And then I had one friend who was a guy and uber Catholic. We actually went through confirmation together. After I told him, a few days later, he called me and told me that he told his whole family because he “needed a strong support system to help cope with what I told him.” Really? You need support for me being gay? We had a very intense conversation about it and after that, he never called me again. I knew I’d probably lose some friends during this whole process, but I consider myself blessed that almost all of them were so good to me and so helpful.

Then came the hard part. Telling my parents. Punchie and I had been together for about four months. By then, all my friends had known, but my family didn’t. And I had no intention of telling them for at least another few months. I just wasn’t ready and I knew they weren’t ready, especially since I was still fresh off my divorce. But then I got sick. Really, really sick and I ended up in the hospital and had to have a very invasive surgery. Punchie was the one who drove me to the hospital and she stayed by my side the entire time, sleeping in chairs, or right next to me in the tiny hospital bed. My surgery was scheduled in a few days and I had to call my parents to tell them what was happening. I knew they would head over to the hospital and become near-permanent fixtures until I was out. Punchie and I discussed it and knew that there was no way around it. They would inevitably run into her because she was literally there 24/7. She never left my side. So we agreed it was time to tell my parents. We even figured it would be best this way because I was in a hospital and how mad could they be at me if I was laid up in a hospital bed about to go in for a life-altering surgery? So Punchie headed off to work (which she missed a lot of while I was in this hospital) and my parents came by to visit me. This was before the surgery, but I was still in a lot of pain, so the nurses pumped me full of the wonderful painkiller, Dilaudid. It was VERY powerful and left me completely high whenever they pumped it into my veins. I was at the apex of my high when my parents came in, so I don’t remember much of the conversation, but I do remember the important parts. My parents asked me who took me to the hospital and who had been taking care of me. I told them it was my friend, Punchie (I obviously used her real name with them). They asked who she was and this is pretty much how the conversation went:

Me: “Well, she’s actually more than a friend. We’re dating.”
Dad: “What do you mean dating?”
Me: “We’re together.”
Mom: “Together how.”
Me (still very high and kinda scared): “We’re…you know…together. We’re dating.”
Dad: “I don’t understand what you’re trying to tell us.
Mom (yelling very loudly to the point where I swear every doctor and nurse in the hospital could hear): “SHE’S EXPERIMENTING!!”

Yes. That happened. My mother then proceeded to pick up the People magazine next to her and read it cover to cover without saying another word. We all sat in uncomfortable silence. She finally excused herself to go to the bathroom and while she was gone, my dad spoke up. And I will never forget what he said. He looked at me sternly, shook his head and said to me: “You know what?” Expecting the worst, I replied, “What?” His look softened and he smiled and said, “I love you, kiddo.” And that was that. The look on my dad’s face at that moment made me know that, eventually, everything would be okay. My mom came back from the bathroom and said she was ready to leave and didn’t say another word to me. They left and Punchie came in and held me, trying to stop me from shaking.

My mom continued to struggle with this for a very long time. She didn’t talk to me for a while and she NEVER brought up Punchie until I started bringing her home to visit. We had a lot of difficult talks that ended in both of us crying. My dad was much better about the situation, but even he, too, was struggling a bit. They both strongly disagree with gay marriage and voted Yes on California’s Prop 8. But while my dad was getting to know Punchie and asking about her all the time, my mom kept trying to get me to go to church, saying I wouldn't be like this if I just went to church more. It’s taken some time, but Punchie is now considered part of the family. My mom even gives her a Christmas stocking every year. But it took a long time for her to get there. It’s still a daily struggle for my mom.

But I know how she feels. It was a daily struggle for me, too. The guilt I felt, the confusion…it’s not an easy thing. But it gets better. And it gets fun. And you learn to live life for yourself, which is the best way to live it.

*The names have been changed

Actress Kristy McNichol Comes Out!

2012-01-07T17:16:00.000-08:00

Hey all, this is Anna. So I know I owe you guys my “part 2” story, and I’ll be posting that very soon. But today, I bring you exciting news! Well, exciting for me, anyway. Even though I was a child of the 80s and 90s, I’ve always adored movies, music and tv shows from all decades. When I was going through my late 70s/early 80s phase, I discovered the wonder that is Kristy McNichol. The movie was “Little Darlings” – a 1980 gem that was way ahead of it’s time. It was like “American Pie” for girls. And it was awesome. That was when I kind of fell in love with Kristy. She was an adorable tomboy with serious acting chops and she could sing, to boot! A winning combination.

Kristy with Tatum O'Neal on the set of "Little Darlings"

And I’m not kidding about her acting ability. As a theater major, I often studied different actresses in their pivotal roles and Kristy’s roll as tough tomboy, Angel Bright, on a quest to lose her virginity in “Little Darlings,” was one of them. She blew me away and still does every time I re-watch it. She also starred as (surprise!) loveable tomboy, Buddy Lawrence, in the 70’s drama “Family” – for which she won two Emmys – and showed off her singing skills and comedy skills in the cheeky and cheesy “Pirate Movie.” I went through a minor Kristy obsession about 20 years after her heyday and long after she left the spotlight, even acquiring all the songs she’s recorded and an autograph photo of her from eBay!

Tomboy Kristy

Why am I giving you all this background? Because I want you to know how stoked I am about the fact that, after years of speculation, Kristy has come out as a lesbian! And she did it in her own time and on her own terms, which is awesome. She also did it for a very good reason: to help kids who are bullied about their sexuality. Though she has always led a fiercely private life once she retired from acting, Kristy says that because she is “approaching 50” she “wants to be open about who I am.”

She has been happily living with her partner, Martie Allen, for the past two decades. According to her publicist, she is “very sad about kids being bullied” and “she hopes that coming out can help kids who need support. She would like to help others who feel different.”

We’re so happy for Kristy and so proud of her for helping all those who are trying to discover who they are without being persecuted.

Kristy grasps her Emmy.

Anna's Coming Out Story, Part 1

2012-01-05T11:22:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone! I hope the new year is treating you well. Sorry we’ve been MIA for the past few days, but we’ve been dealing with sickness and family and work and diets and resolutions and all that fun stuff. But we’re back and ready for some action. Alli and I decided it would be best to kick off the new year with some more personal posts about ourselves so you can get a little more into the minds of the ladies writing this blog. Our purpose for this blog is to not only discuss fun gay things in pop culture, but also to open up a dialogue with our readers regarding the topics we write about – including personal stories.

So with that, I am ready to share my coming out story. There are several aspects to a “coming out” story: when you first start to realize, when you finally accept it for yourself, when you tell you friends, when you tell your family, etc. Mine is kind of a long story, but I’ll summarize it as best I can. My coming out story is sort of a two-parter, so please bear with me. You kind of have to know my history in order to understand my coming out story. Here is part one:

By now, if you’ve read our past posts, you already know a little bit about me. Born and raised in a Catholic family in a fairly conservative community, went to an all-girls Catholic school, and had always dated boys through high school and college. The thought that I might be gay was always pushed back to the far corners of my mind. I never allowed myself to even entertain the idea for more than a second. Since I started dating at 14, I almost always had a boyfriend. I don’t know if I was trying to overcompensate for something, but it just always worked out that I had a boyfriend. But nothing ever really seemed to feel right. When I lost my virginity…well…the guy had dumped me a week later for a girl he was already cheating on me with and it took me over a year before I could even try sex again. I thought maybe it was because I was so hurt, but it was probably because I really just didn’t enjoy it.

In my sophomore year in college, I met Mark*. We dated for 5 years, suffered one really nasty breakup in our third year where he made me feel like complete shit. He broke up with me on Thanksgiving when my whole family was out of town and I was supposed to spend the day with his family. (I lost 15 pounds during that breakup…best diet ever), then we got back together a month later and the following year, he proposed to me. I felt no sparks, no emotion. I didn’t cry when he proposed, like they do in the movies. It was done in a rather mundane way for me. At a restaurant on Valentine’s Day. It’s not a terrible way to do it, but certainly not the way I would have wanted. But I loved him. I really did. So I said yes. And that was that. I was getting married. My parents would be so happy…because…ya know….all I ever wanted was for my parents to be happy. So we got married a year later. I’d been having second thoughts the whole time and I even talked to my mom about it. She said it was just cold feet and it was perfectly normal. So then I decided to talk to Mark about it. He said he had been feeling nervous, too, and that it was normal. So that settled it. I was having a normal reaction.

In the meantime, our sex life was anything but exciting. And the more we did it, the less I enjoyed it and I just couldn’t figure out why. I didn’t get what the big deal was and why everyone thought it was this great thing. That should have been a red flag for someone about to marry a guy they didn’t like having sex with, but to be honest, sex wasn’t all that important to me at the time. I now know why. By this time, was heading into a deep depression. I didn’t know why at the time, but it took me a while to realize a lot of it had to do with the fact that I was in a somewhat abusive relationship with the man I was going to marry. Not physically, but mentally and emotionally. I’m not weak-minded by any means, but somehow he managed to make me believe that no one else would love me like he did and I didn’t deserve any better. He would disappear for days at a time only to show up and tell me he went camping last minute with his brother. But when I wanted to hang out with my friends, he didn’t want me to. And he hated when I got all dressed up for something and wanted me to go back and change. Things like that should have been red flags, but I was in way too deep by this point. I didn’t even notice what my friends had pointed out to me later: he had barely any personality. He never made me laugh. And I love to laugh. My friends often wondered what I saw in him and to this day, I really can’t tell you. Maybe I just thought he was safe. But in my heart, I knew I loved him. I just didn’t know to what degree.

So, we got married in a wedding perfectly suited for my parents: in a Catholic church with 200 of our friends and family, followed by a reception at a hotel on the beach. I didn’t know it then, but looking back, that entire day I was just going through the motions. About a year after we were married, things really went downhill. I’d come home and he wouldn’t even look up from his book or his computer. He brought a book with us to restaurants, the movies…you name it. He didn’t really talk to me. I was lost and felt unwanted. I suggested couples therapy, but he scoffed at the idea and said that everything was fine and he was just tired from work. The further away he pulled, the more depressed I got. I then started to develop a close “bond” with one of my best friends at the time, only to later realize I had a crush on her. Soon the thoughts that I had pushed away for so long were now at the forefront. I could only push them back for a matter of minutes before they were front and center again. I started to look at everything differently. Even the music I listened to started to take on a whole new meaning. As my friend and I grew closer and closer, I tried to cling on to Mark, who was only pulling further away. Soon, my friend and I were going out to bars and clubs, getting drunk and “innocently” making out (in her eyes, at least). She assured me it wasn’t cheating (she had a boyfriend at the time) and I believed her. Our trysts didn’t last long, but the guilt I felt was staggering. We didn’t have sex or anything…just made out. But still, I was married and it wasn’t right, so as much as I enjoyed it, I was relieved when it came to an end.

I tried to work on my marriage, but it was only getting worse. He would start fights over nothing (even blaming me for him getting into a car accident when I wasn’t even with him at the time). I couldn’t figure out where all the hostility was coming from. I thought maybe he suspected something, but there was no way he could. I was pretty badass at keeping secrets. It was now about a year and a half into our marriage and we just grew further and further apart. So, we said that maybe we should try a little time apart from each other. Only for a week or so at a time. In the meantime, I was secretly exploring these annoying thoughts that I might be attracted to women. During this time, I stumbled upon some youtube videos with Jessie and Katie (Evan Rachel Wood and Mischa Barton) from “Once and Again.” Soon, I was completely consumed by them. I started writing fan fiction in order to relieve some of the tension I was feeling. My writing was a creative outlet for me. By this point, I wasn’t sleeping at night. I would lie awake and allow my thoughts to take over me. It wasn’t long before I was officially deemed an insomniac. So I wrote. And I created fan videos on youtube. And it helped. Then I discovered a Jessie/Katie fan forum page and that’s where I met Alli. Sweet, little, innocent Alli, who was having the same exact questions that I was having. We bonded and became fast friends with our feisty wit and the way we pretty much connected on every level. And yes…a crush was soon developed. But that’s a whole other story.

So after a bit more exploring, I was finally at the point where I couldn’t take it anymore. The silence between us, the insomnia – we were a married couple. We should be able to talk about anything. So I suggested couples therapy once more and was met with another scoff. So then I sat Mark down and had an honest conversation with him. I told him I loved him and would be lost without him, but his distance was driving me crazy and driving me to do stupid things, like question my sexuality. I was terrified to tell him this, but I wanted to be honest. I asked him for his help. I wanted to make our marriage work, so I told him I needed his help in figuring this out so we could get through it together. I didn’t want him to hide or ignore me anymore. To my surprise, he reacted calmly and said “okay.” We talked for a bit longer and then we went to bed. I still didn’t sleep.

We didn’t talk much more about it after that, but I did notice he started to be a lot nicer. And we decided to give it another go. Then one day, he told me he was going to go camping with his brother for the weekend to clear his head. I said okay and I thought it would be a good time to visit my parents for the weekend. But when I came home that Sunday, I found our apartment had been ransacked. All my prized possessions (including my guitars) were thrown everywhere and it was just a huge mess. I started to panic, thinking we had been robbed, so I called Mark to see if he had been home yet and if he was okay. Then, as I was calling him, I looked around and realized that only my stuff had been tossed around while his stuff was nowhere to be found. I ran to our closet and found all his clothes were gone and all our computers were gone. He then got on the phone and informed me that he had left me and I was on my own. He took his name off the lease, had the electricity shut off, and took me off his insurance. When I started crying and pleading with him, he told me, “If you don’t stop fucking crying, I’m going to hang up on you and you’ll never hear from me again.” But I couldn’t stop crying. So he hung up. And that really was the last I heard from him. He left me behind to clean up the mess he left (literally). I had to go through and find all sorts of painful memories in that apartment. He soon wiped out all of the money from our account and sent me divorce papers through the mail. I found a new place to live after that.

I cried for good long week after that. And then…I had the revelation. I was newly split from my asshole husband and questioning my sexuality. I tried so hard to do right by my parents and get married to a nice boy and start a family. Well, that didn’t work. So what was I going to do now? For once, I was gonna do what I wanted to do.

To be continued…

*The name has been changed to protect the asshole.

Goodbye to Sian and Sophie

2011-12-31T13:56:00.000-08:00

Anna Says Farewell to Sian and Sophie

Unfortunately living in the states we don’t get the channel that airs “Coronation Street.” At least not where I’m at. Thank God for the Youtubes. Without it, we might have never known of the trials and tribulations of one Miss Sophie Webster and her bestie-turned-girlfriend-turned-fiancee Sian Powers. Thanks to those who are kind enough to post the Sian/Sophie scenes on Youtube, we get to experience what Alli and I like to call “The Jessie and Katie of Britain.” If you watch the show, I’m sure you know by now that Sian is leaving the show, which leaves Sophie all alone to deal with her lesbianism (and her feelings for Amber – YUCK!!!!!!) Sian and Sophie epitomizes everything that is beautiful and sweet and innocent and real.

It all started off innocently enough for the two best friends: with a fight over a boy. It didn’t take long for Sian (played by the gorgeous Sacha Parkinson) to realize that Sophie (played by equally beautiful Brooke Vincent) wasn’t interested in any boy, but actually had her sights set on someone a little more feminine...and blonde…who’s name also happened to start with an S. Sophie’s coming out leads up to a very powerful scene in her bedroom when she fully realizes her feelings for Sian. They’re fighting and crying and trying to patch up their friendship. Then, in a moment of pure magic that makes me wish I was sixteen again, Sophie kisses her. And that’s about the time where my heart stops beating and drops down to my stomach. There’s that moment of “Oh crap. Oh no she didn’t!” And then you just wait and wait for Sian’s response. Ugh…it gets me every time.

Sian does the typical “freak out” thing where she takes off and won’t talk to Sophie and is confused as to why she kissed her in the first place. Soon enough, they have it out and are brutally honest with each other. Once Sian’s head is cleared and all of Sophie’s cards are on the table, Sian decides to give it a go with her best friend and they solidify their new relationship with another kiss. But it’s not an easy road. They do all the fun things that I love to see play out in these stories: they sneak around, hold hands when no one’s watching, steal kisses in dark corners, and make out while babysitting (that’s a fun episode!) Sophie’s family is rather conservative and Sophie and Sian are both Christians who attend church regularly, so the conflict between Sophie’s feelings and her religion also play important part in the story.

Soon enough, the girls are outed in a crazy-intense episode and then there is massive fallout, particularly with Sophie’s parents. Soon they become the talk of the town and the pressure, scrutiny and constant berating from Sophie’s parents lead them to run away together. It’s a harrowing and romantic ordeal and I ate up every moment of it. I was with them from their first kiss to their first fight to their first time (which was such a beautiful scene and filmed so perfectly...if only it were just a bit longer).

Well, now that their storyline is sadly coming to an end, we figured it was probably a good idea to write about them seeing as how they made such an impact on us. This is a good example of a lesbian storyline done right. And, as much as I want a happy ending and as tragic as it is to see Sian go and as much as I mother effing detest Amber, it’s at least somewhat realistic. I just watched Sian’s final episodes with the wedding and as the truth came out about Sophie’s second thoughts and her crush on Amber, I almost teared up seeing the heartbreak on Sian’s face. The episodes leading up to it that showed Sophie’s reluctance to get married (even though SHE was the one who so adorably proposed to Sian) made me want to scream: “Sophie, what the fuck are you doing??!! Are you insane?” Ugh…and to have these doubts because of lame-ass Amber (a character with no redeeming qualities that I can find) is even worse. But the final scene with both girls crying, nay - sobbing with every bone in their bodies shaking and quivering and Sophie screaming for Sian to come back…well, that was more than I could bare to watch. Afterward, I immediately crawled into bed with my girlfriend and made her hold me until I fell asleep. I was almost tempted to put on “Finding Nemo” to cheer myself up, but it felt too good to leave her arms. Sophie broke Sian’s heart and they both broke mine.

But alas…that’s how life goes sometimes. And to be seventeen and newly gay and in love and getting married, but having feelings for someone else - I can see how it was all too much for Sophie. I guess we can take comfort in the fact that at least they didn’t kill off Sian. Their beautiful relationship simply ran its course. It doesn’t make it any less bittersweet, but we can hope that Sian will run off and fall in love with a new, hot girl to have lots of sexy time with. (Yes, I know she’s fictional, but that doesn’t stop me from imagining her future.)

As for Sophie and Amber: I don’t know what’s gonna happen there, nor do I care. So until someone even remotely as good as Sian comes along for Sophie, I think I might have to say goodbye to “Corrie” for now. At least until I can get that nasty, bitter Amber aftertaste out of my mouth. Maybe a Sian and Sophie reunion will be in the cards sometime down the line. But until then, I’ll just have to re-watch all their scenes and fall in love with them all over again.

It’s a story that makes you feel good all over (up until the end, of course). And it makes you kind of want to relive your youth and reminds you of being young and in love for the first time, regardless of whether or not you’re gay or straight. They laugh, they fight, they play, they are full of epic cuteness that’s sweet enough to melt your brain. Sacha Parkinson is one hell of an actress and, as you can see from the photos, she is cute as fuck. I know that’s rather blunt, I really have no other way of putting it. Her facial expressions and delivery of lines just shows that she knows how to have fun with the role. And she easily moves from light and fun to serious and dramatic. I really can’t wait to see what she does after “Corrie.” And Brooke Vincent is a true champion, taking on such a multi-layered role. We could see her struggle and her love for Sian every step of the way. Even near the end as she was having second thoughts, Brooke was able to convey her inner turmoil in such a way that it constantly elicited visceral reactions from me
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If you’re not familiar with Sian and Sophie, check out the Sophiesiantube channel on youtube. All their scenes from the very beginning are posted on there in order. Don’t worry: once you’ve been watching a while, you get used to their accents. And if you want the quick version to see if they really are with watching (and they are…trust me on this one) here is a video of all their kisses.

Alli Bids Adieu to Sian and Sophie

Well Anna pretty much covered the wonder that is Sophie and Sian. I will just add in a little bit more for good measure. I first discovered Sophie and Sian through the SophieSianTube on YouTube, as well, and I fell hopelessly in love with the dynamic between these two characters. Like Anna mentioned, it literally just made me want to be a teenager again and falling in love for the first time. Also, their first kiss scene in Sophie’s bedroom was such a close resemblance to that of Jessie and Katie’s first kiss that it makes my heart flutter every time.

I will miss Sacha Parkinson as the ever-so-adorable Sian Powers. I will miss her so much, in fact, that I’m not sure that I will be able to continue following Sophie’s storyline without Sian by her side. It’s not that I detest Amber with the same passion as Anna (although I fully support her right to hate any character she damn well pleases because we’re besties and that’s what besties do), it’s just that you cannot trump or even match the gorgeousness that is Sacha. From her beautiful eyes, to the rockin’ body, and the cute way she squeaks out, “So-phay!”—there just is no better match for Corrie’s young lesbian lead.

However, like Anna mentioned (again!) one thing I will always be grateful for with this show is that the writers made it so incredibly realistic. Even right up to the end with two kids coming the realization that you don’t always get to spend your life with who you’re in love with at 17-years-old. It was heart-breaking to watch Sophie throw herself at the car and crying out in utter pain, but who of us hasn’t been there, in a state of total confusion and pain? First loves are the best…and also the very worst.

My hope for the future is that they have Sophie date around and grow up a little bit (like Anna, I hope it’s not with Amber). So then, in a few seasons when she’s older and wiser and emotionally secure with herself, the show can write Sian back into the storyline. You know, like a random running into each other in the street type storyline, and then they’ll fall hopelessly back in love and realize that this time—yes, this time!—its right and it will work. Then, Sophie and Sian will live happily ever after. I think I should be a writer for the show. Just a thought…

Anyway, for any of you who have yet to discover this wonderment that is Coronation Street and the Sophie/Sian relationship be sure to check out the SophieSianTube here: http://www.youtube.com/user/SophieSianTube

And start from the beginning to get the total effect! I hope everybody has a Happy New Year and cheers to 2012!

Anna's Favorite "L Word" Character

2011-12-30T17:19:00.000-08:00

Greetings and salutations! I hope everyone enjoyed their holidays. Alli and I sure did. I spent my Christmas with my girlfriend’s family in Canada. It’s rather cold up there and I’m from a warm climate, so it was definitely a shock. But we had a good time just hanging out with her family and sleeping and eating. A LOT. Does anyone have any fun plans for New Years?

Anyhoo, Alli and I have a lot in store for the new year regarding The Locker Room, so stay tuned for that. In the meantime, I thought I’d close out 2011 by paying tribute to the show that changed the way lesbians were viewed on TV. The show that ran for six seasons on Showtime and introduced us to all sorts of fun, interesting and annoying characters. Oh yes, I’m talking about “The L Word.” Now, there’s a lot to delve into about this show, and we will definitely get to that in the near future. But today, I’m just gonna get my feet wet by writing up a little profile on my favorite L Word character and sharing why she’s my favorite character.

Now I know so many people are very passionate about “The L Word” and which characters they think suck and which are the best. And I’m one of those people. I have the characters I love (Shane, Carmen, Alice, Dana), the characters I dislike (Max, post-season 2 Jenny) and the ones I’m always back and forth on (Bette, Tina…). And when we delve more into the show in later posts, I’ll definitely get more into that. But today, I’m going to share with you my favorite L Word character: Helena Peabody.

I love a good character arc and I love watching characters evolve before my eyes. The L Word often allowed the characters to change with each season and the character that evolved the most was Helena Peabody (portrayed by the ever-so-talented Rachel Shelley). She started out as a rich, powerful, bitchy lothario, seducing a pregnant Tina while Bette helplessly looked on. She didn’t exactly start out in my good graces. I think that’s why I like her so much. Because she went from someone I hated to someone I really adored. By the third season, she redeemed herself and proved herself to be a loyal and worthy friend. She even came through for Kit by buying out SheBar from Dawn Denbo and her lover Cindy.

Besides Dana, Helena seemed to be the most genuine of all the characters once she stopped trying to use her power and money to get what she wanted. When she could no longer buy her friends’ love, we learn she is truly an authentic and sweet behind that façade. She’s kind, loyal, flawed and just wants to be liked. I think we can all relate to that. She’s also generous, hilarious and has that insanely hot British accent. Plus…she’s hot as hell.

What I hated most about Helena’s story is that they always paired her with the worst people and she was one of the hottest on the show! When we first meet her, she seduces her psychiatrist – a woman far too old and not even in the same league as Helena. Then she dates a pregnant and emotionally unavailable Tina. When we meet Winnie, Helena’s ex, we find that she is a shrew of a woman that doesn’t deserve Helena. And don’t even get me started on Dylan…and the fact that they brought her back at the end to try to get with Helena again is just a travesty. Then came bitchy Catherine who had poor Helena sent to prison. Oh, it’s just too much! Helena deserved so much better. Then they put her with her cell mate, Dusty and they just run off together? It’s enough to make my head explode. The hottest girl Helena got was Leigh Ostin (played by the luscious Cobie Smulders) and they barely even tapped into that relationship. God, I wish they had shown more of that. The hottest action Helena got was when Shane tried to kiss her while saying their goodbyes. Classic!

Regardless of her not-so-positive track record with women, Helena remained the cockeyed optimist and a romantic at heart. And she proved she could hold her own in the worst situations – being cut off by her wealthy mother and starting over being completely broke, surviving prison, being betrayed and blackmailed and swindled. And she still came through with a smile on her face and a gleam in those gorgeous eyes.

And in closing, I will leave you with one of my favorite Helena scenes. It’s literally five seconds long, but it cracks me up every time. Fast forward to 50 seconds in and watch Helena fall off the treadmill. And now that you’re all caught up on Helena, who is YOUR favorite L Word character and why?

FanFiction Fun for All

2011-12-28T10:20:00.000-08:00

Hi all! Alli here. I’m hoping that everybody had a Merry Christmas or a Happy Hanukkah or perhaps just a few days off work to relax and recharge a bit before bringing in the New Year. Anna and I have been quite busy over the last week or so with our family Christmases and traveling to see our girlfriends’ families, as well. In a couple days I plan to meet up with some old friends to welcome the year 2012 with lots of alcohol and food as I am sure a lot of you out there will be doing, too.

After the New Year holiday and our winter breaks end early next week, Anna and I plan to get back on track with our regular postings, photos of the week, and Glee updates. So for now I’m just going to leave you with a little reading material. As I mentioned before I have a keenness for really good FanFiction. I truly believe sometimes that it is better than the actual show or movie, itself. Anyway, lately I have been reading the work of a particular FanFic writer from FanFiction.net who writes stories for the Brittana relationship. I feel she does a fantastic job with capturing the personalities of Santana and Brittany. And who doesn’t love a little Brittana action? Especially since the stories can take it further than the networks and actually show us what we wanted all along!

I hope you all enjoy these stories as much as I do and be sure to leave the author feedback if you do!

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7560685/1/If_Only_You_Could_See_What_I_See

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6903370/1/Must_Be_Felt

Photo of the Week

2011-12-23T10:03:00.000-08:00

As I (Anna) have previously stated, I've got a thing for soccer players. They are such incredible athletes and have stamina to spare. To quote the move Dogma: "Mass genocide is the most exhausting activity one can engage in, next to soccer." It's true. It requires serious strength and endurance. And Alex Morgan has all that, plus a rockin' body AND a gorgeous face. Kind of a lethal combination. I'm proud to say that the youngest member of the US Women's National Team grew up only 15 minutes from where I grew up. It's fate! Well, okay, not really fate. But I think it's pretty damn cool. Alex never ceases to amaze me. She hasn't quite built up the experience to start in the games of the US Women's National Team, but every time they bring her in (usually around the 2nd half) she almost always scores a goal in her first few minutes of play. I don't know how she does it, but she so flawlessly kicks the ball in with the outside of her foot, like it's not big deal - like she's been doing it all her life. She's a born natural. She's sporty and sexy and this photo is proof positive of her beauty. I love that she can be so athletic while also embracing her feminine side. This is such a vulnerable shot and I'm so thankful that Alex shared it with the world.

Alli's "Free Pass" Celebrities

2011-12-20T20:21:00.000-08:00

As Anna promised, here I am with my top five “free pass” celebrities I would…you know…if ever faced with the opportunity. I’m going to switch it up a bit from hers and do mine in descending order, and so, without anymore beating around the bush (pun intended) here we go:

#5: Rachel McAdams

Holy mother of whatever-higher-power-you-believe-in, Rachel McAdams is by far one of the most talented and stunningly gorgeous women in Hollywood today. For me, it all started with Mean Girls and her spot-on portrayal of a hot high school super bitch. Then, my interest blossomed with her adorableness in The Notebook and Wedding Crashers, and finally, I reached full-out infatuation the first time I saw The Family Stone—not many people can make cynicism look so hot. Not only can Rachel McAdams pull off pretty much any hair color she wants, but she could so totally make ‘fetch’ happen.

#4: Piper Perabo

I swear I try not to sound repetitive but when it comes to pretty girls my brain turns to mush—much like that of a seventeen-year-old boy. So, again, holy mary mother of something or other, Piper Perabo! I mean…you’ve all seen the singing on the bar scene with the water dumping and sexy dancing from Coyote Ugly right? RIGHT!? If that wasn’t enough to make me fall completely in lust with her, she has also been gay for pay—TWICE! The first time was in Lost & Delirious (which co-starred Anna’s girl, Mischa) and the second time in Imagine Me & You (which I have already reviewed…if you haven’t read it yet, do yourself a favor, and check it out).

#3: Naya Rivera

With all of the Glee-Caps and pure love we give out to Naya each week for her Brittana relationship, I really feel I have adequately conveyed my intentions toward Naya Rivera. However, I must share with you a happenstance from last weekend with my friends. We were in a bar and drinking to holiday cheer, and naturally, the conversation of ‘who would you switch teams for’ came about. I’m the token gay friend so my responses were Justin Timberlake and…well that was it. To my complete amusement (and immense enjoyment) one of them mentioned ‘the hot Latina girl from Glee,’ and with that the rest of the girls all sang-talked in unison, “Ooohhh myyy goddd, yesssss!” One mentioned that her voice was the best on the show. Another deeply sighed and said that she was ‘so sexy.’ Now, I don’t want to make any of my friends sound trashy but they all very much love the penis and only the hotness that is Naya Rivera could possibly make them so squirmy in their seats and considering playing for the other team. Hats off to her for having that sort of influence.

#2 AND #1: Evan Rachel Wood

That. Just. Happened. Anna is a thief and took all the good pictures of Evan AND all the good descriptions. Not to mention, she also had her as her #1 when I clearly called dibs on ERW well over 4 years ago. Anna also cheated and used an ‘honorable mentioned’ category…bringing her total to six. So I will only mention four girls and make the epitome of hot—Evan Rachel Wood—count for two. Because, let’s face it, she could easily count for all five. There’s no question. Don’t argue with me. Just look into her crystal blue eyes. Or at her perfect lips. Let your eyes slowly drag down that smokin’ hot, toned body. Turned on? You should be. But don’t be fooled because she’s not just a pretty face. She’s incredibly talented (acting and singing wise), super adorable, and very insightful—just follow her on Twitter and you’ll see what I mean.